Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Professional croissant on closed course. Do not attempt.

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Our Lady of the Heavenly Spheres

Hail Mary, full of perpetual marble runs
  (+7, -1)
(+7, -1)
  [vote for,

This is an adaptation of a Cathedral roughly the size of Notre Dame.

Marbles start at the top of the spire, and roll along a track in the roofline, in and out of windows, jumping into gargoyle mouths, along the flying buttresses, and into the upper heights of the cathedral, where there are a number of ball-activated features to symbolize the busyness of heaven as sculptured wooden angels are perpetually activated to flutter their wings, lifing people, play harps, etc.  At the altar there is a plinko game, whomever is praying at the location that the ball lands in gets their sins forgiven as well as a token to feed into the slot to start another ball down the track.

  When a token is fed into the altar slot below, a few balls are allowed to deviate to the lower tracks where they activate working saints, praying saints, worshiping saints, a nickelodeon playing some appropriate hymn music, a rotating kaleidoscopic stained-glass window(tm) and a waterfall baptismal.

Every hour, a ball rolls onto a diverted track which activates the hour chime, another carefully- coordinated rolling ball-activated masterpiece of mechanical music such as we've all seen online lately.

At the end of its journey the ball is lifted by Saint Sissiphus back up to the spire.

RayfordSteele, May 01 2019

Claudius https://en.m.wikipe...iki/Apocolocyntosis
The process was still under development, and sometimes produced a pumpkin instead of a divinity. [pertinax, May 01 2019]

Euhemerus https://en.m.wikipe...org/wiki/Euhemerism
He relied on a slower, artisanal process. [pertinax, May 01 2019]

Elgin https://en.m.wikipe...,_7th_Earl_of_Elgin
Lock up your marbles. [pertinax, May 01 2019]

I was thinking something like this for the organ... https://youtu.be/IvUU8joBb1Q
Wintergatan Marble Machine [RayfordSteele, May 02 2019]

St Ball https://www.reddit....ll_puns_saint_ball/
There are all sorts of things on the internet aren't there [bhumphrys, May 02 2019]


       This idea is a load of balls.
MaxwellBuchanan, May 01 2019

       We were going to say that.   

       // Saint Sissiphus //   

       Sisyphus was a figure in ancient Greek mythology rather than a Catholic saint.
8th of 7, May 01 2019

       Yes I'm aware of that. But his story is no more mythological than many of the rest, no?
RayfordSteele, May 01 2019

       True. There are many saints whose reputation rests on very shaky foundations. This is particularly true of St. Gustav of Thrace, alas the patron saint of architects.
MaxwellBuchanan, May 01 2019

       Some saints (St Demetrius in Greece, St Brigid in Ireland) are almost certainly rebrandings of pagan gods and, if you connect that process in series with (1) experiments in apotheosis as developed from Lysander of Sparta to, say, the Emperor Claudius or (2) the process hypothesised by Euhemerus, then that could get you a St Sisyphus.   

       Anyway, watch out for Lord Elgin; he's incorrigible.
pertinax, May 01 2019

       Jeremy Corbyn ?
8th of 7, May 02 2019

       This is an excellent idea. The balls could be of the type with flashing (or not) LEDs and glitter in them, so that the night- time ball fall is appropriately fabulous.
calum, May 02 2019

       It's not explicitly stated in the idea, but I assume that the church organ would be replaced with a giant xylophone, played by the falling balls striking it.

It might be going too far to have heavy metal balls smite people who emerge from the confession having confessed horrible sins.
hippo, May 02 2019

       But if there are no heavy metal balls, there'll be no heavy-metal ball gowns, and I was looking forward to seeing those, to say nothing of heavy-metal tuxedos.
pertinax, May 02 2019

       The image of balls jumping into gargoyle mouths is more than a little disturbing.   

       ^smiting [+]
whatrock, May 02 2019

       [RayfordSteele] Did you buy a supporting T-shirt?
wjt, May 04 2019

       Will there be pinball?
Voice, May 04 2019

       Or a voice for Strandbeest?
wjt, May 04 2019

       Will there be a gigantic neon "TILT" sign on the roof ? Good for earthquake zones...
8th of 7, May 04 2019

       Not much need for a T-shirt with support. Maybe in 10 years I’ll have moobs...
RayfordSteele, May 05 2019

       Pinball with the flappers being styled as Michaelangelo’s Sistine Chapel God and Adam arms.
RayfordSteele, May 05 2019


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