Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
"This may be bollocks, but it's lovely bollocks."

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Paintball Snipers, Inc

add some spice to your life
  (+8, -1)
(+8, -1)
  [vote for,

If you're a businessman tired of the daily grind this service will perk you right up! Just sign on the dotted lines and wait.

At least once a month someone will hit you with a paintball from somewhere. It could be on your way to an interview or when you need a raise, it could be on the day of an important meeting; you definitely have a pony in this show.

If you fail to spot the sniper he could ruin your whole day so change your routes, keep a sharp eye, and carry your paintball gun: The only way to stop him is to get him before he gets you.

Voice, Nov 09 2012


       911 ? There's a man with a gun on the roof....
piluso, Nov 10 2012

       All the shots are directed towards the groin.
rcarty, Nov 10 2012

       //keep a sharp eye//   

       Interesting choice of words. In an impact between eye and paintball, want to guess which one wins?
ytk, Nov 10 2012

       Better actual guns with marker rounds. More accurate, more realistic, and best of all, you can mount a sound suppressor...
Alterother, Nov 10 2012

       I've actually heard talk that marker rounds don't hurt as much as paintballs; I don't know how true that is, since I've never been hit by one or been present during their use (saw me some at a gun show, once). They're smaller, but they travel much faster.
Alterother, Nov 10 2012

       [+] not that I particularly like the idea, but it has a sort of Insp.Clouseau/Cato flavour to it.
FlyingToaster, Nov 10 2012

       ^same reason for my bun. I pretty much like all ideas like that.
Alterother, Nov 10 2012


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