Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Pianist Scratcher

Don't lose the rhythm.
  [vote for,

Performance nerves can cause your nose to itch just when you need both hands on the keyboard.

What you need is a little thing like an emery board wrapped round a thimble, supported near face height on two or three rigid metal arms which are screwed into the body of the piano.

You probably need three, in a lopsided tripod arrangement, in order to achieve adequate rigidity.

Two of the arms could be anchored at the corners of the little shelf where you rest the music. I'm not sure of the best place for the third.

They should all incorporate locking pins which can be withdrawn to allow the device to be folded away (whenever the piano is to be used by a non-itching person).

Oh yes, and you also need to practise hand-eye-nose co-ordination.

pertinax, Nov 06 2007


       Could do with this on your driving test where taking your hands off the wheel for anything other than changing gear is thoroughly frowned upon. [+]
theleopard, Nov 07 2007

       Yes, but every time you took a left turn (U.S. - right turn), the score of Handel's Bourrée would fall into the examiner's lap.
pertinax, Nov 07 2007

       WITTWB (sp?): Muffled #%*$-scratcher for scratching in public without that give-away sound.
vincevincevince, Nov 07 2007

       Telephone orders for this could be interesting.
jtp, Nov 07 2007

       + typists could benefit from these, too.
xandram, Nov 07 2007

       Can't you incorporate your nose-scratching into your page-turning motion? (or wait for a big jump from bottom to top of the keyboard)
phundug, Nov 07 2007

       off-topic old joke:   

       Guy walks into a bar and sits down next to a man. On the bar in front of the man is a tiny man playing a tiny piano.   

       Guy exclaims, "Woah! That's amazing! Where'd that come from?"   

       Man says, "Well, this magic wand," producing same, "is supposed to give you whatever you ask for, but..."   

       Guy snatches the wand, "Wow, really? I want a million bucks!"   

       Suddenly a million ducks show up all around him, quacking like mad. "Wha???"   

       Man says. "I tried to tell you it doesn't work. Do you think I asked for a ten-inch pianist?"
globaltourniquet, Nov 07 2007


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