Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Pirates of the Carbon Credits

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(+3, -3)
  [vote for,

I was driving down the motorway, feeling guilty about the mileage I was clocking on my own in the car, when the feelings were intensified by a passing Toyota Prius with no less than five people in the car.

That makes their fuel consumption a staggering 400 miles/gallon/head(uk) (333 miles/gallon/head(us), 0.70625 L/100km/head), compared to my pathetic 40 miles/gallon/head(uk) (33.3 miles/gallon/head(us), 7.06L/100km/head)...

...BUT WAIT! Between us...

<fevered scribbling> 7.06+3.53 = 10.59375 L/100km/6heads = 1.77 L/100km/head = 160 miles/gallon/head(uk) = 133miles/gallon/head(us)! <\fs>

I'll TAKE those carbon credits! Now all I need is a small paint splat cannon mounted on my car to mark all fuel efficient cars as MINE, ALL MINE! Paint can be easily wiped off at the end of the car journey.

Clearly different people require different colours to differentiate: I'll bagsey custard yellow. Optional extras include crossbow sucker darts (see linky) with gps to track what mileage was actually achieved before removal, as well as full pirate regalia. Bring Your Own Parrot.

TheLightsAreOnBut, Jun 01 2007

Intercar_20Crossbow Intercar_20Crossbow
Just add GPS tracking [TheLightsAreOnBut, Jun 01 2007]

Mods available Pirate_20Cars
[TheLightsAreOnBut, Jun 01 2007]

747 mpgpp http://travel.howst...com/question192.htm
[MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 01 2007]

road vs rail (pdf) http://www.transwat...rt-fact-sheet-5.pdf
Apparently rail isn't that great. [TheLightsAreOnBut, Jun 04 2007]


       Oooh, what if I splat a bus? Anyone got bus fuel efficiency data?
TheLightsAreOnBut, Jun 01 2007

       Spat a 747! They get over fifty miles per gallon per head.
Galbinus_Caeli, Jun 01 2007

       Oh, and don't you DARE shoot me in my prius or on my scooter!
Galbinus_Caeli, Jun 01 2007

       Veering to avoid [jhomrighaus]'s crossbow dart (see link), I get knocked off my bike by a custard yellow paintball from [TheLightsAreOnBut]!   

       I get home black and blue, with yellow stains.
pertinax, Jun 01 2007

       [pert], I cycle myself in town, so you'd only be in danger if you cycled on the motorway. Which, I can vouch from personal, painful, experience, is not advisable.
TheLightsAreOnBut, Jun 01 2007

       //Spat a 747! They get over fifty miles per gallon per head.// 100mpg according to link.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 01 2007

       Who knew a british head was only 83% of an american head!
GutPunchLullabies, Jun 01 2007

       Spurious math aside, I've always wanted to be a pirate, so [+] from this Captain.
awesomest, Jun 01 2007

       GutPunch: I'm not sure, but I think it's from the fewer teeth.
Ander, Jun 01 2007

       //Who knew a british head was only 83% of an american head!// measured the amount of air/water/gas/whatever?   

       why is this under 'paint'?
po, Jun 01 2007

       // why is this under 'paint'?   

       maybe car:fuel:alternative, then?
TheLightsAreOnBut, Jun 04 2007

       // //Spat a 747! They get over fifty miles per gallon per head.// 100mpg according to link. //   

       The difference is based on the number of passengers assumed, I gather. The consumption figure is based, however, on cruising fuel consumption, when an airplane consumes by far the most fuel taking off and landing. Thus, to make use of these figures, I would need to splat a full 747 only at cruising altitude. I think a full train might be better, and easier to splat...   

       [edit] Though, apparently, UK trains are not that great. I'll stick with splatting National Express, then.
TheLightsAreOnBut, Jun 04 2007

       Is there an idea here?
Cuit_au_Four, Jun 04 2007

       //Is there an idea here?//   

       I suppose the core idea is to give some visible expression to a wish (in this case, the wish to take credit, either morally or financially, for the carbon-savings of others), without actually contributing to the fulfillment of that wish. That description fits some great art. But not everything is great art that fits that description. [no vote yet - go on, convince me]   

       b.t.w., remarkable link, [TheLights]! I wonder whether anyone's attempted a rebuttal.
pertinax, Jun 04 2007

       Interesting and counter-intuitive, certainly. Does the analysis assume, for example, that the train has 400 seats and they are all full?   

       I'd point out that the train has two possible advantages: either 1) you have more space than you do in a coach, or 2) it's crammed full of standing passengers and its specific fuel consumption is anything up to 50% better than quoted.   

       Further to those, the train is going to lose some efficiency simply because it is moving faster.
david_scothern, Jun 04 2007


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