Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Pocket Excuse Generator

Never get caught out again with the Pocket Excuse Generator
  (+7, -2)
(+7, -2)
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The Pocket Excuse Generator (P.E.G.) would be the size of a pager and would have just a few buttons. When the user needs a good excuse to get them out of a spot of bother they would start by calling up a list of general subjects from the P.E.G. (e.g. "I'm Late", "I've forgotten something", "I done something"). This would produce another list to navigate so that they could quickly build up their scenario (e.g. "I'm late for an Important Meeting", "I''ve forgotten your birthday", "I've got lipstick on my face", etc.). On pressing a button to confirm their problem a list of suitable excuses will be produced from a database of thousands. If they don't like the excuse they move onto the next one. If they chose an excuse they can mark it as "used" so that it doesn't come up again or "bookmark" it so that they can find it quickly if they want to use it on someone else.

The interface must be simple and quick to use so that the user can get an excuse within 10-15 seconds. There could even be a similar web site providing excuses which WAP phones could connect to.

Uncle J, Jul 24 2000

(??) The Alibi Agency http://www.alibi.co.uk
This site provides excuses to your wife/husband if you are having an affair! [ccaamgw, Jul 24 2000]

(?) Robs snappy answer generator http://download.cne....lst-7-17.td-884801
software that could generate random excucuses [beretboy, Jul 24 2000]


       There was a Saturday Night Live skit about a service that provided excuses for late package delivery (hearsay -- I didn't see this one). When you were late sending something, you'd send it via this carrier -- they'd mangle the package and postmark it around the world and the disheveled deliveryperson would show up at the recipient's door with the package and the excuse that it got routed the wrong way, etc.
syost, Jul 24 2000

       I saw this device several years ago that had recorded sound bites, such as a baby crying, a doorbell, etc. that you could play while you were on the phone to escape from those phone calls you want to end.
quanta, Aug 27 2000

       Ya know syost, I actually saw that. Absolutely hilarious. They'd deliver the package with tiremarks and everything.
AfroAssault, Oct 12 2000

       There is already software similar to this called robs snappy answer generator WILL SOMEONE PORT THIS TO PALM PILOTS!!! (see link)
beretboy, Nov 09 2000


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