Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Rifled Champagne

Better Beverage Ballistics
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By adding rifling to the inside of a champagne bottle's neck, the range and accuracy of the cork could be much improved.

I leave it to the reader to think of amusing uses for this feature.

5th Earth, Feb 22 2007

Champagne sniper http://www.c00lstuf...mpagne_Cork_Sniper/
Imagine what this guy could do with one of my bottles... [5th Earth, Feb 23 2007]

Twist-off cork http://www.gizmag.com/helix-cork/27951/
[xaviergisz, Jun 19 2013]

[link]






       Genius.
moomintroll, Feb 22 2007
  

       Brilliant.
hippo, Feb 22 2007
  

       *dives for cover*   

       What they said.
imaginality, Feb 22 2007
  

       I don't believe it will increase distance or accuracy in terms of cork trajectory - since the cork already sits at the top of the bottle anyway and doesn't get enough time during a pop for the rifling to impart any spin.   

       However, a rifled champagne bottle might create a vortexular swirling action in the pouring of the product, both improving speed, and accuracy of delivery.
zen_tom, Feb 22 2007
  

       Lay the bottle on two parallel pencils on a table or floor, when the cork pops the reaction will thrust the bottle forward on its rollers, you now have a rifled champagne bottle cannon.
skinflaps, Feb 22 2007
  

       I had rifled champagne once. We nicked a bottle from a case by the gondola to Trockener Steg in Zermatt.
nuclear hobo, Feb 22 2007
  

       Champagne corks, in my experience, go for the eyes.
ldischler, Feb 22 2007
  

       This could be made much more dangerous if you incorporated a lawn dart into the cork.
nomocrow, Feb 22 2007
  

       What Zen_Tom said.
GutPunchLullabies, Feb 22 2007
  

       I think a limiting factor may be the poor ballistic design of the cork itself.   

       Maybe you could make the cork into a pre-split sabot around a smaller, denser projectile portion (I dunno what would be appropriate - perhaps a miniature champagne bottle?) you might get better performance than a thrown cotton ball.   

       (Oh, here's the rest of that other croissant.)
lurch, Feb 22 2007
  

       the idea seems dumb
samosa_pirate, Feb 22 2007
  

       It just seems that way. I distinctly heard it speak a moment ago.
normzone, Feb 22 2007
  

       this annotation seems dumb
Custardguts, Feb 22 2007
  

       You must be right, I can't hear a thing.
normzone, Feb 22 2007
  

       Re: concerns about the cork being in the bottle for too short of a time for the rifling to work, may I point out that cork, being soft, may use much more extreme rifling than conventional bullets. I envisage some fairly substantial ridges, so that the cork practically has to be screwed out of the bottle. Not too steep of an angle though, or of course the carbonation won't be able to force the cork out at all.
5th Earth, Feb 23 2007
  

       //so that the cork practically has to be screwed out of the bottle// Funny, that's how they told me to remove a champagne cork in waiter school. Clamp your hand over the cork and the neck, and twist. There should be no noise, no foam, and no flying cork. No fun, either, but that may be why I'm not a waiter anymore.
baconbrain, Feb 23 2007
  

       who invented it?
po, Feb 23 2007
  

       //There should be no noise, no foam, and no flying cork.//   

       Or as it was explained to me in a bad French accent, "It should make the whisper of a virgin, not the fart of a whore!"
nomocrow, Feb 24 2007
  

       //the cork already sits at the top of the bottle anyway and doesn't get enough time during a pop for the rifling to impart any spin.//   

       Not so. Whatever velocity the cork has when it leaves the bottle, it has acquired it during its 3cm journey through the neck. Thus, rifling will impart a spin consummate with its forward speed.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 19 2013
  

       >Not so. Whatever velocity the cork has when it leaves the bottle, it has acquired it during its 3cm journey through the neck. Thus, rifling will impart a spin consummate with its forward speed.   

       I thought you were going to say commensurate with its forward speed. It's a much funner sentence as you have written it, and I think it makes the point even stronger, in a sense.
fishboner, Jun 19 2013
  

       That's the one. Commensurate. The champagne distracted me.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 19 2013
  
      
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