Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Robotic Lateral Distribulator

Child/Pet Tolerance Tester
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The decision to have pets or children is a very difficult one. The Robotic Distribulator can help in that decision. Like autonomous robo-vacuums this device wanders about the premises, but rather than cleaning it sweeps a robotic arm across surfaces to disrupt, dislodge and distribute objects randomly. The Deluxe model has a reservoir for water/oatmeal mixture which is disgorged at random times and locations throughout the premises. Another optional feature is is the infra-red food detector which enables the robot to feel entitled to distribute your food to novel locations at random.

Experiencing this joyful mayhem in advance may help the indecisive before the big commitment.

CecilL, Oct 10 2005

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       HAHAHA!! Strangely enough I would quite like one of these - even though I already have a child and many animals.
wagster, Oct 10 2005
  

       It needs to be cute. No-one adopts poltergeists.
bungston, Oct 10 2005
  

       Not sure I understand the pet part. Dogs locate and dispose of said ballistic nutrient disbursements.
Shz, Oct 10 2005
  

       I assume the RLD puddles the floor randomly because it (a) represent pee from an untrained toddler, or (b) looks like a fireplug-shaped puppy piddle magnet.
reensure, Oct 10 2005
  
      
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