Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Self deprecating Sports Score Tie

Sports scores displayed on the tie as you drone on and on
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This way, rather than yawns and watch glances, I imagine I would get more chuckles and, "thank you"'s.
JesusHChrist, Jun 01 2013

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       Yeah, or maybe it should have a cross-platform- smart-phone- compatible channel-switching-capability so that my victims could change channels from sports scores to pornography to Pinterest to the shopping channel. Actually, maybe I should also invent a Google Glass app for me that obscures the real world and instead displays a crowd of people looking interested and smiling and nodding their heads every time I pause or raise my eyebrows mid-soliloquy.
JesusHChrist, Jun 01 2013
  

       I thought maybe this would be for Red Sox fans or some other perpetual underdog. Or maybe some super winning team but the tie would modestly downplay the success - eg "Cleveland had a lot out with injuries" or "They always do well at home".
bungston, Jun 01 2013
  
      
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