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Shut Up, Phone!

  [vote for,

Nothing more irritating than hearing somebody's phone going off in a physics lecture or Vaudeville revival performance, then waiting while the idiot fishes through pocket or purse fumbling for the cursed thing to silence it. Totally unnecessary, though. Phones all have accelerometers these days, and a good slap or (if it's in a purse) kick should be sufficient to silence it.

The phone, not the idiot.

ytk, Feb 08 2014

US patent # 20120231838 http://www.patentst...0231838/claims.html
Microsoft patents whacking off [CraigD, Feb 09 2014]


       Apparently Windows Phone OS does this, Microsoft calls it "whacking off".   

       (I say apparently because no one has ever used Windows phone OS.)
tatterdemalion, Feb 09 2014

       Not yet fully baked (as in actually implemented), but patented, it appears.   

       Looks like Microsoft patented "controlling audio of a device" by "whacking" it - which tech watcher have more catchily termed "whacking off" - in Sep 2013. See link.
CraigD, Feb 09 2014

       (I say apparently because no one has ever used Windows phone OS.)   

       Lol. Im using a windows phone right now. I'm the one... You can also slience it by flipping it over.
evilpenguin, Feb 09 2014

       // The phone, not the idiot //   

       Why not both ?
8th of 7, Feb 09 2014

       What [8th] said.
Grogster, Feb 09 2014

       What [Grogster] said. In fact, we should all bun this idea in support of what [8th]>[Grogster] said.
swimswim, Feb 09 2014

       He'll be found guilty of second degree murder and get out in a couple years.
rcarty, Feb 09 2014

       ... and then they'll make a movie about him.   

       Oh, the irony.   

       // Im using a windows phone right now //   

       That's really, really not something you should be sharing on a public forum. Altho you're probably more deserving of pity than condemnation.   

       There is, thankfully, an organisation to help you. It's called IG Farben Gmbh, and it makes a wonderful product called Zyklon-B …
8th of 7, Feb 09 2014


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