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I've got to admit it... I've let my socks get
out of control. They've nearly taken over.
Like a garden that has become
I think I may have reached the point
I need to get rid of the whole lot and
again. The trouble is that, once socks
become separated, they may
wash independent of each other and
bleach/streatch/wear at different rates,
making a succesful reunion of previously
paired socks nigh on impossible.
The Sock Monster would be a huge
perspex machine with a hopper at one
and a small kiosk selling pairs of
second-hand socks at the other. In the
would be a washing machine, tumble
and lots of robot arms and measuring
devices... and a furnace. A sock monster
definitely needs a furnace.
You would arrive at the gallery with your
odd socks (bringing a lonely sock might
be the admission price of the exhibit)
put it into the hopper. The sock is picked
up by a robot arm and analysed by
texture and smell. Smelly socks are put
straight into the furnace. The remainder
are matched to similar coloured socks of
similar materials and are washed
Once washed and dried, the socks are
categorised by as many attributes as the
machine can measure: length, thickness,
overall colour, colour variation, pattern,
texure, dry weight, wet weight, and so
Socks with too many holes join their
friends in the furnace which is used to
provide 0.01% of the power that the Sock
Monser requires. Socks that match to
within a certain tolerance are termed a
pair, stitched with the gallery's logo,
barcoded and dispensed into the kiosk
where they can be sold to the gallery
Rayford-Steele's lower tech human approach [st3f, Feb 10 2007]
andreuk's decentralised approach to the problem. [st3f, Feb 10 2007]
[st3f, Feb 10 2007]
Sifl and Olly
[jaksplat, Feb 10 2007]
||I think that the socks with too many holes should be converted into puppets and used in tv spots to advertise the sock monster.
||Given that smell analysis precedes washing, I do not think many of my socks would escape the furnace.
||A prime example of my O.C.D. would be my sock drawer. I change my socks at least twice if not three or four times a day. I don't have a good reason other than I just hate the way socks feel after five or so hours. So I buy only 3 kinds of socks, black ones (all the same style, brand, and material) for work, white tube socks (all the same style material and brand) for casual, and low cut white (all the same style, brand and material) for the gym. That way, there are only three kinds of socks to separate after doing my laundry. You could say it's a lot of work for a small convenience, but I, for one, can't stand wearing mis-matched socks. Crazy huh?
||Why this obsession with having a sock on
your left foot which looks the same as the
one on your right foot? I would consider
that to be rather OCDish.
||My other half used to make sock puppets for our son. It didn't go down well. A common sound around our house was "No! Nooo sock hand mummy!".
||I can see the logo now...
||[My folks went to see the sock monster, and all they brought me was this pair of used socks.]
||i myself have a few spares that could use pairing. [+]
||//but I, for one, can't stand wearing mis-matched socks. Crazy huh?\\
||If that's crazy, I don't want to be sane. Also, no way I'd wear a pair of second hand mis-matched socks, but I would like to watch this monster in action.
||Just buy more socks from the store, no need for a sock monster. Quit being a tightwad with your money and buy more socks or don't lose/wreck them.
||i like the idea. my colored socks get mismatched by asychronous washing all the time, and it's annoying as all heck. at least if i could donate the socks it wouldn't be quite as frustrating. this also has some amusing potential when you can get pairs of previously white socks that have been accidentally dyed some other color by crayons, etc. in the wash.
||and what's the big deal with used clothes (even socks)? they're washed! get over your prudish mental block about 'touching something someone else touched'. you use public toilets, yes? that's worse than wearing someone else's *washed* socks.