Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Stand-up pathedian

  [vote for,

There are many stand-up comedians in the world, of varying abilities. Their role is to make the audience experience amusement, which is a close relative of happiness. Laughter is generally a good thing. Audiences are also comfortable with the idea that they are there to laugh, and are uninhibited about so doing.

On the other hand, a good cathartic sob can also be a good thing. Why, therefore, are there not stand-up pathedians whose role is to tell sufficiently heart-rending (albeit generally untrue) stories that their audience is reduced to collective tears? This art form would develop and evolve over time, much as comedy has done, and audiences would quickly learn to engage with the pathedian just as they do with comedians.

MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 07 2019

Comedy necromancer Comedy_20necromancer
[not_morrison_rm, Apr 09 2019]

Nanette https://en.m.wikipe...wiki/Nanette_(show)
[pertinax, Apr 22 2019]


       Could they also feel around as if they were shut inside an invisible glass box?
xenzag, Apr 07 2019

MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 07 2019

       Sadly I have no strong feelings one way or the other about apathedians.   


Sgt Teacup, Apr 08 2019

       I imagine it takes more emotional manipulation for the heavier sadness than a light hearty laugh. That is why sadness is not a quick standup gig but rather firmly embeded in theatrical or movie endings and the odd exceptional piece of music.
wjt, Apr 08 2019

       We would pay quite a lot of [MB]'s money to see a stand-up pathologist.
8th of 7, Apr 08 2019

       ...or a stand-up chameleon
hippo, Apr 08 2019

       Excellent - we're making arrangements now for [8th] to see a pathologist.
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 08 2019

       I'd pay to see a standup logodian, a weaver of logic so deft and artful, they'd be able to convince the audience that black was white, cats were actually dogs, and other feats of logical sophistry.   

       The audience might need deprogramming on the way out, perhaps by a secondary act playing on the same bill.
zen_tom, Apr 08 2019

       So, preachers then?
RayfordSteele, Apr 08 2019

       In store readings of misery lit (which is less of a thing now than it was, but still).
calum, Apr 08 2019

       set it to music, and it's just another somebody done somebody wrong song...
lurch, Apr 08 2019

       New York 1960s beat poets. Those guys would make you wanna slit your wrists.   

       "Waiter, I'll have a Jim Beam on the rocks with a razor and a hot bowl of water."
doctorremulac3, Apr 09 2019

       Ah, but not the late Allen Ginsberg from whom I have a personally signed copy of Howl.
xenzag, Apr 09 2019

       Shouldn't this be titled "Stand-up Tragedian" ... ?   

       You could have Rosencranz and Guildenstern doing a double act.
8th of 7, Apr 09 2019

       No you couldn't. They're dead.
RayfordSteele, Apr 09 2019

       Just remembered me very own stand-up necromancer gig thingy. Link.
not_morrison_rm, Apr 09 2019

       // They're dead //   

       Oh. Oh dear ... our embassies from England come too late ... Take up the bodies. Such a sight as this. Becomes the field, but here shows much amiss. Still, the quality of mercy is not strainèd; it droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven, upon the place beneath - but not from us. Go, bid the soldiers shoot.
8th of 7, Apr 09 2019

       ...or a Stand-Up Proctologist?
Grogster, Apr 12 2019

       "Bend-over Proctologist" seems more appropriate.   

       Then again, afterwards, standing up may be your only pain-free option.
8th of 7, Apr 12 2019

       Baked: link
pertinax, Apr 22 2019


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