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Tirement

Go see the world, while you're still able to enjoy it. Then get back to work, you lazy bum.
 
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The standard age for retirement, for most people, seems to be between 60 and 65 years old. You put off seeing the world, and doing the things that you really want to do in life, so that you can cram 30 or so years of work in the space between your graduation and imminent demise.

Why?? Why take the risk that you might not be able to skydive, see the great wall of china, scuba dive off the coast of Australia, or go streaking through the house of congress, on account of your health (or untimely death)?

I propose that a new employment standard be adopted: the tirement plan. This is a period of time, lasting approximately one or two years, that occurs ten or fifteen years before your re-tirement. It's a time when 45-50 year olds can go out and see the world. It can be conveniently scheduled around your mid-life crisis! Go buy that motorcycle and ride cross country, like you say you've always dreamed!

Upon the termination of your tirement period, you will resume work for the next 15 years, until your re-tirement. Then go finish all the things you didn't get to do during your tirement (Challenge the Dali Llama to a rematch! See the European countries you skipped the first time around! Marry that waitress from the red light district!).

For those who can afford it, and aren't yet tied down to a family, a pre-tirement (age 30-35) could also be worked into your life's plan. Golfing at this age, however, is strictly optional.

Overpanic, Oct 30 2003

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