Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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the opposite of Ikea
  (+8, -2)
(+8, -2)
  [vote for,

When you want to replace your aging Ikea item, you simply call Unikea, and (for a small fee) they will come and carefully reverse the assembly sequence, then take away all of the dismantled components.

"tikea it away please!" (advertising campaign slogan)

xenzag, Aug 10 2010


       It could be called "Aeki". This is a good idea, as flatpack furniture is a nasty mixture of wood, plastic and metal and it hard to recycle. Taking things apart properly would help make it recyclable.
hippo, Aug 10 2010

       Burning the stuff is much more fun. Even the allegedly "flameproof" furnishings will combust in a most entertaining and satisfactory manner, if carefully saturated with a carefully chosen accelerant.
8th of 7, Aug 10 2010

       My flatpack furniture experience has never climbed as high as Ikea "quality", but I can assure you that the old stuff I have encountered cannot be disassembled--it is fallen apart, rusted solid, snapped off, stripped-out or just plain turned to powder, often all at once.   

       A big hammer, a heavy boot and a disposal can--either of accelerant or for garbage--are all the tools you can use. [ ]
baconbrain, Aug 10 2010

       Think it's time for me to take a break myself.... too much negativity here at the moment, and I have other work to occupy my time.
xenzag, Aug 10 2010

       // too much negativity here at the moment //   

       No, there isn't.   

       This would probably work with Ikea stuff, and for people who take better care of their furniture than folks I know. It's a good handyman service to specialize in.   

       I am a bit snarly about old furniture right now, as the only work I have is cleaning out a house full of abandoned everything, and the woman in charge wants to save and repair the rotting furniture. [+]
baconbrain, Aug 10 2010

       Perfect. [+] Currently, I need to discard a piece of furniture assembled shipinabottle-wise and now too big to fit through the door.
mouseposture, Aug 10 2010

       // too big to fit through the door. //   

       Det cord will be your friend on that one, we surmise. Either for the furniture or the doorway; doesn't really matter which ...
8th of 7, Aug 11 2010


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