Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
It might be better to just get another gerbil.

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alligator guns

the solution to that quick on the draw stalemate.
  (+4, -3)
(+4, -3)
  [vote for,

2 armed men face each other, snarling and looking mighty ugly. I don’t know what their beef is with each other (its a woman or a gamblin’ debt most probably) and I aint going be too forward in the asking.

“go for your gun, Pete” growled Tom.

“whatever you say, Tom, you got it coming to yer” barked back Pete.

they were men not dogs by the way, I said that didn’t I?

the two men both drew their pistols at lightning speed and faced each other in a standoff, no-one wins situation. what’s to do?

well, what Pete didn’t know was that Tom had acquired himself one of those fancy schmancy all-singing, all-dancing, state of the art alligator pistols. Tom chuckled knowingly as a frown crossed Pete’s by now, even uglier mush.

deftly, Tom slid off the safety catch alongside the barrel of the gun and swung open the handle to reveal a bright metallic scissors mechanism that puzzled poor Pete who was watching mesmerised. Tom snapped the two sides of the mechanism together, the barrel of the gun yawned open like the jaws of an alligator revealing sharp angry toothed edges and using these jaws, Tom sprang forward & seized Pete’s gun right out from his gnarled fist and tossed it gaily up, up and away and as it descended he caught it on a twirling left forefinger. If there had been a smoking gun to blow into, he would have done so.

our hero wins the day.

po, Jul 07 2003

(?) Alligator Shoes http://www.mcphee.com/pixlarge/M5653.jpg
[Amos Kito, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]


       Do they use alligator clips?
phoenix, Jul 07 2003

       very much based on that, big P. you have your finger so much on the throbbing pulse of everything.
po, Jul 07 2003

       Do you live in West London?
FarmerJohn, Jul 07 2003

       //I don’t know what their beef is//   

       Pete was snickering about Tom's alligator shoes. [link]
Amos Kito, Jul 07 2003

       Ever stood between two angry men with guns pointed at each other? I know I have.
thumbwax, Jul 07 2003

       But croikey Pete's got hiself a newer Crocodile Colt. It takes Pete's hand off at the wrist as he blows the non-existent smoke from his spurting stump.

Sorry 'bout that. I just got back from the chiropractor...you understand.

       love that link, thanks
po, Jul 08 2003

       <Steve Irwin> So oy got me tarp out for nuthin' ? Oy better go lite me bar-bee.</Steve Irwin>
silverstormer, Jul 08 2003


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