Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
I like this idea, only I think it should be run by the government.

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drive by curtains

moths? no dear, gang bangers
  [vote for,

Moths eating curtains are an unfortunate part of low income existence. To avoid embarrassment when neighbours or parole officers drop by - the drive by curtain kit is a handy way to change the subject and move onto more serious matters in your neighbourhood. It contains a large drill bit (in a small plastic carry bag - with comprehensive instructions) - which can be drilled (or hammered if such appliances are absent) into your opposing window wall to give the feel of an actual bullet riddled surface. A pair of scissors or the same packaged drill bit can also be used to punch additional holes into the curtains to give a consistent machine gun aesthetic alongside the moth eaten sections.

For added sympathy, drill a hole into the forehead of a framed picture of Jesus or a family photo discreetly placed on the wall above one of your children's cots.

benfrost, Dec 10 2004


       There should be bullet hole decals to apply on your windows opposite the moth holes included in the kit to complete the presentation.
jurist, Dec 10 2004

       I thought this idea would be for bulletproof blinds.
Worldgineer, Dec 10 2004

       Loved the "added sympathy" segment.
Machiavelli, Dec 10 2004

       Just have a smoking Fruishi Gatling gun sitting in the kitchen.
mensmaximus, Dec 10 2004

       What, no bullet-riddled moth?
FarmerJohn, Dec 10 2004

       Another good one from benfrost. Now just please clarify on the content of the "comprehensive instructions"?
sophocles, Dec 10 2004


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