Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Think of it as a spell checker that insults you, as well.

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self-lighting cigarettes

Cigarettes that light their selves
  [vote for,

The cigarette is made as usual from a thin plastic sheet wrapped around recycled seagull droppings and the leftover bits at the bottom of pop-tart wrappers, liberally doused in smoke flavour and concentrated nicotine extract.

The tip of the cigarette is coated in white phosphorus, and the bottom of the packet is filled with a layer of oil.

When the addict withdraws a fag from the packet, the tip is exposed to the air and so ignites.

WARNING: THIS WAY UP is printed in large type on the outside of the pack.

pocmloc, Dec 02 2019

Death Star Underwear Death_20Star_20Underwear
Shameless elf-promotion [8th of 7, Dec 03 2019]

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       Self lighting cigarettes have been invented from time to time. There was a company called The Self-Lighting Cigarette Co, which is a strong indication.
MaxwellBuchanan, Dec 02 2019

       //THIS WAY UP is printed in large type on the outside of the pack //   

       Should that not be "THIS SIDE TOWARDS ENEMY" ?
8th of 7, Dec 02 2019

       Your arse tattoos are entirely your own business, [8th].
MaxwellBuchanan, Dec 02 2019

       Yes, but the'ol "That's no moon…it's a space station !" gag is a killer.
8th of 7, Dec 03 2019

       //The Self-Lighting Cigarette Co// is not entirely unambiguous though.
pocmloc, Dec 03 2019


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