Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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stinking badges

Don't share your air.
  [vote for,

Coronavirus is airborne. To reduce transmission, it's vital to ventilate spaces so plauge bearers' lingering viral breath can't make its way into your lungs. But how to tell? Air, after all, is invisible. And what to do about people who can't grasp the concept that a face mask needs to cover the nose to be of any use?

Enter the Stinking Badges. Intended for use by workplaces that can't shut down, Stinking Badges are simply little plastic scent diffusers that clip to your clothes or an ID card and emit an unpleasant smell. They can be refreshed after each shift with Dippel's oil or some other suitable chemical. (Cowards can opt for the Freakishly Strong Spearmint version instead.) Thus, each human is surrounded by air that becomes unpleasant to breathe, but not so unpleasant as breathing through Covid-filled lungs.

Employees are protected from the smell of their own Stinking Badge by their mask, if they are wearing it correctly (and the badge is a constant inducement to do so). Concentrations of smell strong enough to make it through masks are a discernable, if still invisible, indicator that someone needs to open all the windows and turn on all the vent fans.

gisho, Jan 22 2021

Dippel's oil https://en.wikipedi...wiki/Dippel%27s_oil
[gisho, Jan 22 2021]

The scent of terror https://www.bbc.co....inister-soviet-past
[pertinax, Jan 22 2021]

Things I won't work with: Thioacetone https://blogs.scien...rk_with_thioacetone
If you want to really enforce social distancing... [prufrax, Jan 23 2021]

if you care to listen https://sasquatchchronicles.com/
verbal accounts of Bigfoot sightings or encounters [xandram, Jan 23 2021]

Not noisome https://www.thevint...-work-productivity/
Also stops the noise [4and20, Jan 25 2021]


       (+) We don need no...   

       What 2 fries said - been dying to say that all day [+]
zen_tom, Jan 22 2021

       Shirley, we could simply mandate washing hands... but nothing else. This would create a cloud of funk around each person for the same effect, with no additional, in fact, fewer resources used.
bs0u0155, Jan 22 2021

       + I want to smell like a Sasquatch! They say that is the stinkiest smell there is!
xandram, Jan 22 2021

       What, worse than lawyers ?   

       Since the typical "medical" mask does little or nothing to exclude odours, since they don't seal to the face and the filter material isn't dense enough, with the properly chosen odourant we forsee mass projectile vomiting.   

8th of 7, Jan 22 2021

       Other Sasquatch ?   

       Canadians ?   

       How do you tell the difference - by smell ... ?
8th of 7, Jan 22 2021

       Sasquatch don't play hockey.   

       They could play hockey of course... it's just beneath them.   

       *they* in this case are Sasquatch researchers.
xandram, Jan 23 2021

       Ah; a somewhat limited field of endeavour, seemingly largely confined to TV documentary makers.
8th of 7, Jan 23 2021

       Actually I am somewhat wrong about the researchers, they get a lot of their information from folks who had a Sasquatch encounter and tell their stories...but Not all Sasquatch have that stinking odor.   

       link provided
xandram, Jan 23 2021

       This was all resolved decades ago, by the father of science fiction. [link]
4and20, Jan 25 2021


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