Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Aerial aerating gardening gun

Aerate lawns the easy way
  (+4, -1)
(+4, -1)
  [vote for,

Aerating lawns, by spiking them with a garden fork or a specialized machine is supposedly good for their health.

Doing this by hand with a normal garden fork is back-breaking, and using a aerating machine requires lugging a machine to and from a hire shop.

Instead, just place a call to your aerial gardening service (the same company who provide crop spraying aircraft for larger areas) and they will send round a helicopter with a mounted heavy machine gun which fires a torrent of iron bullets into your lawn, leaving lots of foot-deep holes for your soil to breathe.

As an alternative service for the budget-conscious, the helicopter can fly at a higher altitude and a volunteer from the local gun club can use your lawn as target practice.

Keep pets and children indoors during the aeration.

Srimech, Dec 09 2008

Pyrotechnic Planting Pyrotechnic_20planting
Shameless Self-promotion [csea, Dec 09 2008]


       A good prelude to Pyrotechnic Planting [link]. +
csea, Dec 09 2008

       Oh yes, i'd apply for that job! "Wanted: Machinegun operator for aerating lawns. Training provided."
superjohn, Dec 10 2008

       Biodegradable bullets would be a better idea.
hippo, Dec 10 2008

       Didn't we do 50 cal tree planting a few years back?
coprocephalous, Dec 10 2008

       But iron is biodegradable.
Srimech, Dec 10 2008

       If the gas suppy piping runs uder the lawn, this could be REALLY spectacular .... [+]
8th of 7, Dec 10 2008


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