h a l f b a k e r y
Professional croissant on closed course. Do not attempt.
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Tired of having rogue golf balls plow through the windshield of your brand-new Rolls-Royce parked in the course lot? Of getting knocked unconcious by some arrogant golfer's longshot hole-in-one? Well, sir, fret no more. The new Patriot Anti-Golf Ball Laser (PAGBL) is here.
The PAGBL is easily capable
of vaporizing an airborne target several thousand feet away. All golf balls used on a course outfitted with a PAGBL would contain tags that transmit faint radio signals. The fully automated targeting system would keep track of every tag on the given course. It would cross reference this with the location of every person on the golf course (also done by radio tags). If It detects that a ball is on a dangerous trajectory, it automatically fires upon and destroys the ball, keeping the golfer safe from harm. Likewise, if a ball is on track to leave the course, it is destroyed, keeping people and objects from becoming victims its wrath.
The technology to build such a device has been around since 1996 when an anti-missile laser beam system was successfully tested by the U.S. at White Sands Missile Range, New Mexico. I think it could be applied on a smaller scale for this kind of application (although it would probably be prohibitivly expensive).
Self-destructing Golf Balls
For when you really, really wish you hadn't hit that car. [phoenix, Oct 04 2004]