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Anti-Mucus Nostril Sacs

Avoid socially devastating splatter sneezes.
(+2, -2)
  [vote for,

You know the kind – the sneeze where your hand/monitor/date’s face is left splattered as if shot at close range with a mucus blunderbuss.

But no more, with the Anti-Mucus Nostril Sacs!

The sacs are packaged as small discs, flexible and mouldable to the dimensions of disparate nostrils. The user inserts them in their nostrils and tiny, thermally-activated micro-hooks secure the sacs in the nostril.

The user breathes as normal – the sacs’ micromesh material allows air to pass freely.

When they sneeze however, the sacs act as a barrier to the ejected material. The force of the sneeze causes the sacs to spring out of their disc state and into their extended state – they are structured in a manner akin to a tiny concertina/wind sock – where they dangle from the user’s nostrils, holding the mucus.

Besides preventing the spraying of mucus all over your surroundings, this would also look hilarious – “Oh Chad! Look everyone – Chad’s mucus sacs have gone again!”

They would come in a variety of colours and styles (eg. national flags, leopard print etc) and could even act as a filter for undesirable matter in the atmosphere (eg. dust, anthrax spores etc).

DocBrown, Feb 19 2004

(ahem...) http://www.halfbake...a/Sneeze_20Balloons
Great minds think alike. [lostdog, Oct 17 2004]


       I don't believe that breathable micro-mesh malarkey for a minute. Breath is moist and would clog up the mesh pretty quick. My nose doesn't need any new rigging. Besides, what's worse; sneezing on your date or sneezing little sac(k)s of mucus on your date?
k_sra, Feb 19 2004

       Also useful for sudden nosebleeds....ihhhlll
phundug, Feb 19 2004

       I don't fancy having footer about attempting to detach the rubbery scrotum of slime dangling from my nostrils each time I sneeze.
calum, Feb 19 2004

       You may have a point [k_sra] but if it was entirely practical it'd probably be baked. I reckon there has to be some kind of material out there in this wild, wonderful world that would be up to the task - or perhaps we could make the sacs organic and construct them of the same stuff as alveoli which are by necessity gas permeable. What you reckon?   

       As for footering about [calum] there would be almost none - the micro hook attachments could incorporate pressure sensors so all you would need to do to detatch the sacs would be to firmly squeeze your nose for a couple of seconds.
DocBrown, Feb 19 2004

       The idea is time-consuming and fairly unattractive. Try turning your face away next time.   

       Welcome to the bakery, btw.
k_sra, Feb 19 2004


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