Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Artificial horizon endoscope

Better image interpretation
  [vote for,

A USB digital endoscope with accelerometers in the camera head.

This means that the camera always "knows" which way is "down".

Thus using relatively simple image manipulation software, when the camera is rotated around its longitudinal axis, "up" and "down" are preserved.

A minature artificial horizon display in one corner of the image (or an overprojected rotating graticule) shows the actual orientation of the camera.

So, that's roll dealt with; yaw isn't so confusing, and pitch information is useful but not critical.

Not sure which way is "up", and you haven't touched a drop of alcohol since last night ? Uncertain about exactly what you're looking at inside your car/aircraft part/electronic device/body cavity ? Then order a BorgCo smart endoscope today!

8th of 7, May 31 2018

RN new stealth sub https://drive.googl...v0C_WnuV_1TzG72599Y
Strangely Hercule Poirot-like [not_morrison_rm, Jun 03 2018]


       I'm pretty sure //accelerometer// isn't the word/device you're looking for. Other than that, yeah.
FlyingToaster, May 31 2018

       Yes, it is.   

       There are chip-level oscillating-bar accelerometers that can detect both static and dynamic gravitational fields. Hand-held game controllers use them extensively.
8th of 7, May 31 2018

       I wonder how roll and yaw might improve an elevator pitch.   

       Regrettably, this joke's wave function always collapses to Willy Wonka.
pertinax, May 31 2018

       You can get blue tablets to help with that now.
8th of 7, May 31 2018

       Hmm, I'm still too idle to get around to doing the "two microscopes and 1 strand of fibre optic cable" experiment.   

       Current wisdom is 1 strand of fibre optic cable = 1 "pixel". I am guessing that could improved on, with microscopes at each end.   

       As the needed bits from microscopes are a bit big for inserting comfortably into a human (even Sturton) I can't recommend it.
not_morrison_rm, May 31 2018


       Seems like it might be handy to know what your orientation is whether you're soaring like an eagle through the clouds or performing this somewhat less majestic activity.
doctorremulac3, May 31 2018

       I'm giving a +1 as I've just seen the optional extras pack, the one with the Das Boot captain's hat + the aerosol with the smell of diesel, sauerkraut and unwashed woolly jumpers.
not_morrison_rm, Jun 01 2018

       For just USD$19.99 plus tax and shipping, you can get two other effects packs as well ... amongst the selection are Indiana Jones pit-of-snakes/King Tut's tomb, Nostromo looking-for-aliens, and Mission Impossible (choice of the Original Series or the modern movies).   

       The Das Boot kit comes complete with an MP3 of ASDIC pings followed by gratuitous depth-charging.
8th of 7, Jun 01 2018


       Thinking about it, why does Team UK only depth-charge the German U-boats and vice versa?   

       It would be more sporting if each side could depth-charge their own side as well as the opposition.
not_morrison_rm, Jun 03 2018

       Oh, that happened ... the real specialsts were the U.S. Navy which sank several of their own subs.
8th of 7, Jun 03 2018

       I'm thinking about some handicap system, giving the subs 2 hours to get away from the harbour. See link - pic of most recent RN stealth sub...   

       Oh well, back to pouring oatmeal and water into a pair of lady's boots, as we must have all done at some time.
not_morrison_rm, Jun 03 2018

       The important thing is to put the oatmeal in first, then add the water slowly. Otherwise it just clumps on the surface, and mostly stays dry.
8th of 7, Jun 03 2018

       Luckily, the boots are swede..or possibly suede --and so water permeable, they are floating in my sink like very strange koi carp.
not_morrison_rm, Jun 03 2018

       ... from which we deduce that The Voices have been particularly loud and insistent today.
8th of 7, Jun 03 2018

       //pouring oatmeal and water into a pair of lady's boots//   

       So ... what did you do with the champagne? Microwave it in pyrex?
pertinax, Jun 04 2018

       // champagne //   

       The nearest he's ever got to tasting champagne is "Albanian sparkling grape-effect beverage" ... it is (in the narrow sense of the word) alcoholic, but in the same way that some products are labelled "Produce of more than one country" this is labelled "contains alcohols" - anything from methanol to long chain molecules which are normally only found in high viscosity hydraulic fluids.   

       Got quite a kick ... best served chilled. Keenly priced too ... by the glass, by the bottle, by the 40 gallon drum ...
8th of 7, Jun 04 2018

       That sounds very much like Sturton's cup of tea.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 04 2018

       (sighs) when I am the Voice of Reason on here, it's a very bad sign.   

       Anyway, the Borg was right, so I just put plastic bags in the boots, filled the bags with water, and they are now in the freezer for a day or two, that's a 98% reliable way to stretch boots/shoes. [famous last words etc].   

       PS I don't drink alcohol, it's possible to get bored of the stuff..
not_morrison_rm, Jun 04 2018

       That's because you stick to boring old ethanol. But there's a whole Universe of alkaknes with OH groups hung on them ... straight chains, branched chains ... go on, try a few different ones, live a little ... OK, so maybe die a little too, but that's how it goes.
8th of 7, Jun 04 2018

       On something of an aside, o2, my internet provider send me helpful emails when I'm nearly out of data. Nothing wrong with that, but...   

       "You've used 80% of your inclusive data allowance this month.Your inclusive allowance will renew on $RESET_DATE...."   

       I've just been taking $RESET_DATE as just some part of the initiative test.
not_morrison_rm, Jun 04 2018

       //But there's a whole Universe of alkaknes with OH groups hung on them// I think the only one recognised as being bibitiously interesting, other than ethanol, is butanol (butan- 1-ol, specifically). You can get drunk on it and apparently it's not harmful. It does taste quite bad, though.   

       In theory, larger even-numbered ols ought to be fairly safe, but I can't find much information on hexanol, octanol or upwards.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 04 2018

       We suggest just feeding a selection to the Intercalary and see what happens. If he survives, maybe try it on a human next ?
8th of 7, Jun 04 2018

       Well, obviously we've done that. We did also advise him to put aside his cigar during the tests.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 04 2018


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