Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Clearly this is a metaphor for something.

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Bad Re-Enactors

Pretend it's yesteryear, with forshadowing
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(+5, -3)
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I have shamelessly stolen this idea from my friend, "Boy" Phillips, with whom something similar to the script below was extemporaneously enacted: pretend it's some pivotal year in the past. Comment on events, with apparently guileless foreshadowing. Along with a friend, play the roles of pompous, bombastic toffs about to be swept aside by the tide of history. Try to make as many allusions as possible to the “future” course of events, while denying or misinterpreting all as much as possible.

Direct quotations belying their actual “future” contexts (e.g., “Lebensraum”, “preside…British Empire”), period speech (e.g., “aeroplane”, “Abyssinia”, “Coloreds”), and avoidance of anachronism per se --except by inaccurate prediction-- are worth extra points.

Each participant is encouraged to attempt to narrow the chronological range as much as possible, so long as it is consistent with previous statements. Unlikely coincidences are allowed, if they are not anachronistic, and further the narrative (e.g., “met....Strom Thurmond”), but the allusions to Colin Powell and Madeleine Albright, below, probably strain the narrative too much for use in actual practice.

E.g., 1934:

"So I don't really expect Roosevelt Minor to be remembered by history, do you?"

"No more than I think that CBS hack, what that Irish fellow, something Murrow, will ever transfix the nation with his reportage."

"Yes, Hoover had a much better grasp of the role of government in the economy. And my money’s on Alf Landon in ‘36. Now that new German Chancellor, what, Hisler? He seems a rational fellow."

"Yes! A man who will make living-room for peace. What’s the German? Lebensraum? And he’s truly cemented German unity forever. But surely always to be remembered as an understudy to his mentor, Mussolini! Now he understands how to keep the natives in line! Fine work in Abyssinia. I doubt the Germans are up to that. Benito makes great use of the aeroplane."

"Pshaw! The aeroplane! The last war showed that the aeroplane is limited to reconnaissance only. And land warfare can’t be won – it’ll always bog done in the trenches! It's all about naval power. Battleships are what win wars. The bigger the better.”

“Battleships, yes. But forget the Marines. They’re not a part of modern warfare. Storming Tripoli was one thing, against the Barbary pirates. But it was proven at Gallipoli that you can’t storm the beaches against a modern army. Ended Churchill’s career, that’s for damn certain. Never see that broken down hack on the government benches again.

“That old man has no vision. Completely outmoded. Only thing he could do for Edward is preside over the liquidation of the British Empire. And I agree with you about Alf. Roosevelt will never make the Democrat Party into a single party. No way to unite the Southern Democrat with the Northern party machines! I mean, the Coloreds will never leave the party of Lincoln to vote with, with, who was the young go-getter from South Carolina we met at that cocktail party? Funny name. Storm? No, Strom, Strom Thurmond. I’d sooner expect young Strom to start his own party!”

“Ha! Start his own party and then become Republican! Ha ha ha! When Alf's daughter is a U.S. Senator -- I mean Senatrix, of course!”

“Ha! That’s a good one! And Thurmond will support a Colored man to replace Cordell Hull! A Colored Secretary of State! Maybe next century. I’d sooner expect a woman running State, this century! Hah!"

protean, Aug 10 2001


       <cough! splutter!> I fail to see the joke. This is exactly the conversation that me my mates will be having in the pub tonight.
DrBob, Aug 10 2001

       This is actually quite brilliant and deserving of resurrection.
justaguy, May 17 2005

       From the title, I imagined people forming the Denis Neilsson Preservation Society, or the Friends of Charles Manson. But otherwise, yes, worthy of resurrection.
TolpuddleSartre, May 17 2005

       From the title, I was expecting a form of reactor using Bad Re:N as an energy source.
normzone, May 17 2005


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