h a l f b a k e r y
"Bun is such a sad word, is it not?" -- Watt, "Waiting for Godot"
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The age old cat/dog standoff generally seems to have two modes. When the cat has the high ground (table/chair/my head) he is able to repel the dog's invite to play or fight by hissing, spitting and fluffing up it's tail. Finally the nose-swipe surprises said dog and persuades him to skulk back to his
rug and equilibrium is restored. When the cat has the low ground it loses the crucial psychological vantage point and furthermore comes within reach of the dog's paws and finds the nasal target has now moved out of range. Unless the cat can find a suitable vantage point within a couple of seconds, it is swiftly forced to flee out the catflap, leaving the dog with the misconception that he is more important and now in charge.
To rectify this, fit one foot long stilts to moggie and put him permanently on a level to eyeball the dog. Better still give him eighteen inch stilts and give him real power. Bind them gently to the lower portion of each leg and cover them by glueing on the bits of old hair from your cat brush. Introduce the stilts from a young age so the cat has a chance to get used to it: he soon won't walk any other way. That leaves only the problem of how to swipe the dog's nose.
A steel mace mounted on the tail should fix that.
get yourself a real man's cat!
[po, Oct 05 2004]
[skinflaps, Oct 05 2004]
[2 fries shy of a happy meal, Oct 06 2004]
The artist has also done some Euro medieval armor for cats, but I can't find it on the web. [luxlucet, Jan 18 2005]
[skinflaps, May 26 2006]
||This wouldn't work if the dog was equipped with a chainsaw.
||Though it first strikes one as unlikely to
be a commercial success, I admire the
both the creative concept and the
eloquent presentation. I also like the
completeness: you've thought the whole
thing through and solved a potential
problem with another great idea.
Indeed, a tail mace could obviate the cat
stilts altogether; I suspect that all but
the largest of dogs will learn quickly
(for a dog, anyway) to respect any cat
||heh, heh,I wish I could give this another bun, as if by magic [+]