Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Commuter Hooks and Harnesses

Rather than being stuck, standing on the morning commute, use meathooks and parachute style harness
  (+5, -2)
(+5, -2)
  [vote for,

Instead of seating and straps from the ceiling for people standing, supply everyone with a "Commuter Harness". As the train stops, hooks decend from the roof of the train so that you can attach and retract as the train leaves the station. This could be fixed so that head heights were the same and nobody has to travel in sombody elses armpit.
dare99, Nov 29 2001

how about doing it this way? http://www.chindogu...chindogu/chin4.html
[mihali, Nov 29 2001, last modified Oct 05 2004]


       I think I'd have a hangup about this.
bristolz, Nov 29 2001

       THe upgrade would be smart hooks/harnesses that knew where you wer going to get off, & gently moved you to the exit at that stop.
hello_c, Nov 29 2001

       hello_c: you wouldn't need to stop the train, you'd just need something like they have for mailbags, to catch them off a moving train with a big hook by the side of the track.
pottedstu, Nov 29 2001

       Please, ladies, only put your large gold hoop earrings in once you're at work. Even intelligent meat-hooks have trouble differentiating between those and belt-loops.
lewisgirl, Nov 29 2001

       I like the image of all the bodies swaying in parallel as the train starts and stops.
beauxeault, Nov 29 2001

       So finish the analogy and skip the train.   

       Hooks are attached to rails in the ceiling of the tunnels. People hook their harness on and are whisked to their destination. (If you've seen _Monsters, Inc._, think about the transport system used for doors, only instead of doors there are harnessed people.)   

       What used to be subway tunnels would be filled with streams of people on hooks swaying gently as they whiz along.
egnor, Nov 29 2001

       People on hooks on tracks. Why do I keep thinking of an abattoir, and what does that say about my attitude to work?
Guy Fox, Nov 29 2001

       Probably pretty much the same as mine, for much the same reason.
StarChaser, Nov 29 2001

       If you don't want to stand up, divide the train longitudinally by padded walls. Passengers enter the carriage from either end, and upon leaving the station it rotates 90 degrees. Customers now find themselves lying on the padded walls, which have become mattresses, and can grab 40 winks before being righted at the far end. There would be a risk of passengers exiting upside down, and the constant rotation on trains with many stops might be an annoyance, but these bugs could be ironed out.
pottedstu, Nov 29 2001


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