Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Cradle To Grave Outfit

Fits you at birth, expands through growth years and fits you when fully grown.
  [vote for,

This outfit expands in size using clever engineering so that it grows with you over the years. Stretch fabrics, accordion designs, expanding overlapping seams etc might be employed.

Obviously this wouldn't be your only outfit, it would just be for the odd occasion when you want to wear the same outfit you wore on the day you were born for some reason. Comforting maybe? This outfit would be repaired as necessary and would probably be some sort of sleeping gear, perhaps of a ceremonial nature for some stupid cult.

People could say stupid things about how the outfit had some kind of meaning due to the fact that it grows through time and gets increasingly gross, just like we do as humans. Or it could have some positive meaning. Whatever.

Eventually you and the outfit get thrown out together because that's the way it goes.

doctorremulac3, Apr 11 2017

Related product _93Cradle_20to_20Gr..._20infant_20formula
[hippo, Apr 12 2017]


       Of course it would be styled to look like Mormon underwear.
RayfordSteele, Apr 11 2017

       So... skin.   

       People could tell the year you were born by the style of your long johns.
popbottle, Apr 12 2017

       Baked in North Korea, where every garment is made from the one type of shiny fabric called Vinalon, and everything is the same few colours and styles. ISIS have a similar ultra extreme ethos to that of the North Koreans, so they would probably like this idea too.
xenzag, Apr 13 2017

       They have one ceremonial, occasionally worn outfit that fits you as a baby and expands until you're a full grown adult?   

       Clearly you don't understand the idea, not that it's a particularly great one, but the idea isn't: "Have one kind of cloth that a culture makes all their clothes from."   

       Not sure how anybody would get that from what I posted.
doctorremulac3, Apr 13 2017

       This is Baked. In your 19th century, some regions experienced a terrifying level of infant mortality. 80% of live births failed to reach their first birthday. So they didn't have time to grow out of their "baby clothes".   

       There was even a fashion for posed family photographs, where the deceased infant was included, as if still alive.
8th of 7, Apr 13 2017

       I saw this invention at MAD magazine once!   

       also, noting there are kevlar socks, a microcoiled kevler could possibly, spandex-like stretch with growth.
beanangel, Apr 13 2017

       //I saw this invention at MAD magazine once!//   

       Really? Cool! I could see them doing that. Don't suppose there's a link to it eh? I'd love to think I'm wired the same way the Mad writers are.   

       As far as the postmortem family portraits, god that was disgusting. Some family, someplace, some time when posed with the opportunity to continue this morbid fad said "Oh hell no!", prompting the decline and fall of this gross ritual. Kudos to them. Ugh.
doctorremulac3, Apr 14 2017

       I know this isn't what you mean [doctorremulac3], but I am plagued with visions of stinky, filthy clothes which stand up on their own post mortem.
nineteenthly, Apr 14 2017

       Clear your mind of stress good citizen, this outfit would be cleaned after every use and only worn on special occasions like, say.... oh.. the person's birthday.
doctorremulac3, Apr 14 2017

       My birthday suit has lasted me for years, but now seems to be in need of a good ironing.
AusCan531, Apr 14 2017


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