Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Crotch Cup Holder

Give chilly willy a break.
(+2, -2)
  [vote for,

Well, let's just say I got back from a long car trip, during which the entire time was spent with an icy cold drink straddled in my lap because it didn't fit in any of the cup holders in the car, and I got sick of holding it. Luckily I am a femme fatale and am only moderately bothered by this, but I can see this being a problem for others... and my legs didn't enjoy it much either. There's gotta be a better way, and here it is. A molded thingy that sticks up out of your crotch, I mean lap, and has two wings at the bottom that secure themselves under your thighs... thus keeping the drink in an upright and locked and secure position. It is insulated, and it is soft and cushy, and it could be misused by many... sigh.
polartomato, Aug 08 2002


       I'd have to say this is kind of baked - just get one of those drink-dispensing hats. I'm sure you've seen them. The hat is usually a hard plastic with a drink-can holder above each ear. There's a y-shaped drinking straw assembly that drops into each can and reaches into your mouth. Just zip, flip, and sip.
Canuck, Aug 08 2002

       Um. Don't drink and drive?
DrCurry, Aug 08 2002

       Could you imagine the looks you would get drinking from a stadium hat on the road?
Mr Burns, Aug 08 2002

       Or with a straw from your crotch?   

       There's a rich lady who should have had one of these when drinking her McDonald's coffee.
FarmerJohn, Aug 08 2002

       I just keep thinking "with wings for extra protection".
rbl, Aug 08 2002

       Canuck: I have one of those hats, and they're pretty good, except for the problem of the syphon effect, which can be way too efficient at times. Besides, you can't wear one in a car as the "can panier" bangs on the headrest when you turn your head.   

       How about a removable, washable fabric cupholder that attaches to the headrest (velcro or elasticated straps), with a dispenser pipe that curves round at mouth level like a boom mike ? Have a little valve on the end that you activate by a gentle squeeze with one's teeth. The dispenser pipes are disposable for hygene reasons. The cupholder can stretch from taking a 330ml can to a full half-litre container of soft drink.
8th of 7, Aug 08 2002

       "Your honor, the victim did not expire from the force of the whiplash. My findings point to death by drowning in a high pressure stream of coke."
FarmerJohn, Aug 08 2002

       That would be an interesting sight in public...   

       "THE fashion statement of the season!"
BinaryCookies, Aug 08 2002

       Well, I for one would rather die from inspiring a beverage than live after having a rigid plastic bracket installed in the front my pelvis by an expanding airbag.... Ooooouch ......
8th of 7, Aug 08 2002

       Why not just get bigger friggin' cupholders in place of, or in addition to, the existing ones that go in normal, less intrusive places. Lots of aftermarket variants to choose from.
dag, Aug 09 2002

       Why don't they make adjustable sized cup holders? i mean really, haven't the Big Gulp and Vente Coffee been around long enough to pose these questions, or has popular culture demanded that no one should want to consume anything as declassé as a Big Gulp (or Vente Coffee)?
kittybot, Aug 09 2002

       usafnoah: I want one where can i get one? I need to know because my junker car sucks. I bought it used and all of the cup holders are misshappen from being used as ashtrays by former owners.
Urban_kayaker, Mar 25 2003

       // People use camel back packs only in situations where both of your hands are occupied //   

       Obviously not true. Those things are more about portability than how many free hands you have, as far as I can tell.
snarfyguy, Mar 25 2003

       //A molded thingy that sticks up out of your lap, and has two wings at the bottom that secure themselves under your thighs//   

       What about amputees,with their legs removed at the socket.......would ther be a version "u" shaped with a round soft point on the other end where you could put the holder into a....shall we say "orifice" to hold the drink holder???
theThinker, Mar 25 2003

       I suspect double amputees when not wearing legs may well use a camelbak as they'll need both hands to operate a manual wheelchair or crutches. If they use an electric wheelchair, they can mount cycle bottle holders anywhere on it.
oneoffdave, Mar 26 2003

       Kayaker: Any sporting goods store, any bicycle store, any outdoor provision co. carries a large selection of waterpaks.
Eugene, Mar 28 2003

       Wouldn't this get uh.. a little distracting to some folks? Especially in those boring and lonely traffic jams?
rapid transit, May 20 2003


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