Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Strap *this* to the back of your cat.

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Donut Chainmail

Chain mail made out of fried dough rings.
 
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Quite simply, Donut Chainmail is chain mail made out of lots and lots of doughnuts. The sheets of interlocking fried dough rings can then be cut into rectangles of varying sizes and sold.

Those wishing to feel royal may fashion themselves flowing cloaks made out of sugar-dusted grease.

If you want a unique birthday cake, stack rectangles of donut chainmail, frost the result, and stick in some candles.

Hungry ghouls could rattle edible chains.

Gangsters wanting to save money can buy a whole new kind of bling, saving on both food and shinies.

Knights can wear vests of fried mail armor to repel churro-swords and kruller daggers.

DrWorm, Oct 06 2009

Scale mail examples http://www.iserv.net/~scottc/items.html
Look at the bracers [Aristotle, Oct 10 2009]

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       This idea desperately needs to indicate how such material is meant to be made.   

       Interlocking rings have to be cut, interlocked and then joined, (unless they are hewn from a big solid block).   

       How do you propose to join the cut ends of doughnuts?   

       Also there is a natural limit on toroidal thickness against centre hole diameter for mail; I have never ever seen a doughnut with sufficient thinness relative to its outside diameter.   

       [ ] while eagerly awaiting more info.
pocmloc, Oct 06 2009
  

       To join the ends, just interweave the *uncooked* dough into mail, rejoin the ends of the *uncooked* dough rings, and when you're done, drop the entire resulting 6-ft square into the fryer.   

       To account for toroidal thickness in mail, ...make donuts with larger holes.
DrWorm, Oct 06 2009
  

       Um, dougnuts actually use a batter, not a dough. As such it can't be weaved (to soft). This might be doable with bagels, or it might be possible to put the batter in a thin metal mold and fry the entire mold.
MechE, Oct 06 2009
  

       I'm sure this is possible with modern technology, batter or dough. Bagel chains are a good idea too.
DrWorm, Oct 06 2009
  

       Hah! Feed The World with edible Christmas decorations. They look good, and on Jan 7th (adjust for local variations) can be taken to the local food bank (adjust for local variations).
egbert, Oct 06 2009
  

       // dougnuts actually use a batter, not a dough. // Then why aren't they called batternuts? I've made them with dough.
tatterdemalion, Oct 06 2009
  

       Okay, let me say commercial ones are made with batter. As for the other, why do you park on a driveway and drive on a parkway? (in the US anyway)
MechE, Oct 07 2009
  

       I should also point out that mail is usually made with rings about 7 or 8mm diameter, and I have never seen a doughnut that small. If you use larger rings then the mail becomes very tricky to handle and loses a lot of its slinky allure.
pocmloc, Oct 07 2009
  

       I think batternuts sounds like an expletive.
DrWorm, Oct 07 2009
  

       Mmm! Doughnuts!
DrBob, Oct 07 2009
  

       //Slinky allure is probably a dersibale feature// I believe you, truly I do!
pocmloc, Oct 07 2009
  

       How about pretzel chainmail?
xaviergisz, Oct 08 2009
  

       To even vaguely look like chain mail, this will be called cheerio mail. I've made chain mail and would think gluing or pressing the rings together to be challenging. Also I think it would break up if fried in sheets, [MechE] has the right idea: //it might be possible to put the batter in a thin metal mold and fry the entire mold//
MisterQED, Oct 08 2009
  

       I think sliced bread was better.   

       But what I don't understand, is, how exactly do they link? You talk about chains and rectangles...and it doesn't seem like one donut would fit in a hole of another, unless they were fried that way...dough pre-fitted together. A mold WOULD work, good thinking.   

       For now I think I'll just go to Krispy Kreme and watch them crank out their donuts on an assembly line.
BouncyPaw, Oct 09 2009
  

       A mould would not work - how would you mould them linked, and then remove the mould?
pocmloc, Oct 09 2009
  

       A multipart, multiaxis mold. It can be done, it just wouldn't be easy or cheap to use.
MechE, Oct 09 2009
  

       The doughnuts would also need to be thin in comparison to their diameter to make anything like conventional chain mail. They wouldn't be like the doughnuts we know and love.   

       Scale mail might be a better prospect, with fried, sugared slabs of dough overlapping each on an edible background (reinforced rice paper?).
Aristotle, Oct 10 2009
  

       A weave of divine tasty treats, the scent of which, will melt the heart and mind of any angry attacker to craving compliance.
wjt, Oct 10 2009
  
      
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