Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Double Entendre Splitter

Avoid those 'sticky moments' of electronic conversation
  (+2)
(+2)
  [vote for,
against]

A plug-in for mail authoring software that highlights the text of a double entendre. The plug-in could suggest either a clean single meaning phrase as replacement, or a more filthy alternative. A third choice would be to leave the text as is, knowing that your double meaning has been 'fully satisfied'. The plug-in's database could be added to in a similar way to virus checkers, via regular on-line updates, as and when really good double meanings 'slip their way' in to common usage.
WYBloke, May 06 2004

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       This is a real Hard One... Croissant or Fish?
I'm afraid i'm gonna have to Bone you!
You ain't gonna see my Buns today... etc
  

       Sorry, got caught up in the fish pancake puns!
MikeOliver, May 06 2004
  

       An excellent title, but I was thinking it meant something else.
ldischler, May 06 2004
  

       I was hoping to hear about the two "Single Entendres" that would be created by splitting a double.
Enjoyer, May 06 2004
  

       You skimmed right over the really hard part of this idea, which is how does a computer program recognize a double entendre in text in the first place? It strikes me as a quite difficult nut to crack.
krelnik, May 06 2004
  

       I need something to quickly and correctly unsplit my infin itive.
FarmerJohn, May 06 2004
  

       "I cannot say enough good things about this invention."   

       --->( detect ... suggest ... replace )--->   

       "I like this invention." (+)
booleanfool, May 06 2004
  

       krelnik, I wasn't 'skimming' and I don't think it's 'hard', since you simply have a database of double entendres, and a grammar/lexical matching algorithm does the rest. As with most spell/grammar checkers, you would be able to add your own 'Entry'.   

       Have I covered your concerns with the hot fudge sauce of understanding?
WYBloke, May 06 2004
  

       Finally a plug-in I would use. I would probably have this set to suggest new double entendres for most of my work. Perhaps you could set up a subscription system similar to virus programs whereby people could add the latest "double entendre" definitions that matched well with current affairs and the political intercourse of the day.
Salted Nuts, May 06 2004
  

       Salted Nuts, you've warmed my cockles with your words of approval
WYBloke, May 07 2004
  

       It would appear that opinion is split on this matter (+5/-5) any croissants spare?
WYBloke, May 13 2004
  

       double entendres are great and a way for the Terminally shy to comunicate(flirt) after all it provides deniability.
engineer1, May 13 2004
  

       Would you be able to use it in reverse? I think it should have both capabilities as, when it comes to functionality, its always better to get your hands on a decent pair.   

       You'd have to be careful that the plug in did not occupy too many bytes in case it filled up peoples' disks. Of course that wouldn't worry me because my hard one is huge but I've noticed other people have often got tiny ones - some of them are even floppy!
dobtabulous, May 13 2004
  

       Yes dobtabulous, I like it both ways too.
WYBloke, May 13 2004
  
      
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