Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Erotirotors - Erotic Pencil Sharpeners

Oh come on, you know you want to...
  (+11, -8)
(+11, -8)
  [vote for,

Nothing will make most men (and some gals) giggle more than erotic gags.

I propose novelty erotic pencil sharpeners, available in both 'vagina' and 'arse' models for all orientations. Imagine the looks you'll get around the office when you plunge your [long, hard, stiff] pencil into one of these babies.

Use your imagination...

victor, May 15 2006

nose http://www.stupid.com/stat/NOPE.html
for if you have a fetish? [zeno, May 15 2006]

(?) Dickie, Koochie, and Boobie Pencil Sharpner http://www.sextoyse...mple&pnum=PD5090-00
This is just wrong. [jutta, May 16 2006]

Vagina Dentata http://www.rotten.c...sex/vagina-dentata/
Courtesy Sigmund Freud, though apparently the underlying anxiety goes back much further in time. [DrCurry, May 16 2006]

Halfbakery: Anti-Rape Anti-Rape
Psst, over here. [jutta, May 16 2006]

If you think cats are sexy http://www.prankpla...X4LQCFeiPPAodWQcAGw
[Kansan101, Jan 11 2013]


       I was picturing just the hole parts and surrounding areas, but if these are successful then next year we can introduce bent-over whole-body versions.   

       Definitely automatic sharpeners for the hole-only versions, but the whole-body versions could use an arm as a crank.
victor, May 15 2006

       Just don't try and sharpen your finger.
skinflaps, May 15 2006

       I did see an 'arse' pencil sharpener once while I was shopping in a tourist-junk store in Florida, but I could not find a link depicting said arse. It was cheap plastic and gross.
xandram, May 15 2006

       [phlish] I like it :)
victor, May 15 2006

       That'll put lead in your pencil.
baconbrain, May 15 2006

       Given that the imagery of sticking your pencil into a vagina/ass is crossed with sticking your dick into a pencil sharpener - erk, no thanks!
DrCurry, May 15 2006

       Love it. Massproduce it become rich.
zeno, May 15 2006

       Can I have one that sharpens in your eye?
ldischler, May 15 2006

       A modification if this could spark an idea for a new brand of female "anti-rape" condoms. oh god imagine how painful that would be, especially if its an electric pencil sharpener. OUCH.
Curiosity, May 15 2006

       And exactly how would you fit an electronic pencil in there?! No, second thoughts, please do not tell me.
DrCurry, May 16 2006

       [Curiosity] Oh, how evil. (I mean rape is also, but i dunno.) I had no idea someone has made or is thinking of making those. I thought they were just in Sci Fi books.
Zimmy, May 16 2006

       just the thing for my erotic pencils.
neilp, May 16 2006

       Like [DrC], I am uncomfortable with the idea of a vagina containing very sharp blades. Doesn't sound very "erotic" to me.
hippo, May 16 2006

       [phlish] you're definitely not wrong :)   

       Thanks for all the feedback everyone. I *love* [ldischler]'s eyedea!   

       [Zimmy] I'm remembering a bit in Snow Crash where the girl relies on something I think she called a 'dentata'. Basically something like this only with a needle filled with a drug that puts the rapist to sleep.
victor, May 16 2006

       Ah yes, the old vagina dentata. (As in the song, "Give 'em the ol' vagina dentataaaaaa!")   

       The idea itself, though, is a manifestation of the schoolroom gag
Questioner: "Have you got a pencil sharpener?"
Helpful Boy Victim: "Yes"
Questioner: "Aahahahahaha! You've got a fanny!" said Questioner having noticed, or at least having had brought to his attention, that a penis goes into a fanny like a pencil goes into a pencil sharpener. I don't think this idea is much of an improvement on that joke.
calum, May 16 2006

       [calum] More of that famous British humour I guess?
victor, May 16 2006

       Very frightening title - actual invention a slight anticlimax?
pertinax, May 18 2006

       Erotic rotivator?
wagster, May 18 2006

       //Erotic rotivator//   

       Some lurker should snap this up as a moniker as quick as possible. YES YOU, WHO HAVE NOT OBTAINED A MONIKER ON THE HB YET!
skinflaps, May 18 2006

       it reminds me of an old "Carrol Burnet show" movie parody skit. it was a spoof of one of those films about a song writer, who needed music paper and a pencil. Carrol pulls them both out of her dress. the writer say that the pencil is't sharp. She sticks the pencil in her cleavage, and we hear an electric pencil sharpener sound.
-wess, May 18 2006

       Damn, that's funny.
reensure, May 18 2006

       The women will take over the world when all the men are standing around all day with their dongs stuck in pencil sharpeners.
Galbinus_Caeli, May 19 2006

       Followed shortly by the extinction of the human race.
DrCurry, May 19 2006

       The women don't need the vast majority of us menfolk. 999 out of every thousand could be removed from the breeding pool and not reduce the numbers in the next generation much.   

       I am assuming that each thousand women could manage to keep one man away from the erotic pencil sharpeners.
Galbinus_Caeli, May 19 2006

       See link. Reminds me of funny cat sharpener that meows when used.
Kansan101, Jan 11 2013


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