Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
The phrase 'crumpled heap' comes to mind.

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Ferret Trousers

For Yorkshiremen.
  (+6)
(+6)
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In certain parts of the UK (which, despite the natives' obvious belief to the contrary, Yorkshire still is) it is common practice (I say common practice; it's probably closer to the truth to say, 'someone did it once and now it's a cliche about all Yorkshiremen') to keep ferrets as pets. For some reason, these are then kept about the person of the Yorkshireman as he sits outside the shed on his allotment cultivating his red (white?) roses.

To make life more interesting for the poor ferret, which is currently just stuck in a pocket somewhere, Moomcorp now offers Ferret Trousers; handmade by dour women in a factory powered by a waterwheel, from the fur of the Lapland Tweed, these trousers have tunnels sewn around the outside, spiralling up and down each leg so that the ferrets can wander around and explore freely within the confines of the trousers.

There's a jacket, too. We're working on a version with larger tunnels, for rabbits. We're thinking of calling it Warren.

Any illustrations would be extremely gratefully received.

moomintroll, Sep 08 2006

A wrongness http://en.wikipedia...wiki/Ferret_legging
Ferrets in trousers. It's grim up north. [moomintroll, Sep 08 2006]

Fun with ferrets http://www.ferretli...n_with_ferrets.html
The more research I do, the funnier I find the word 'ferret'. [moomintroll, Sep 08 2006]

everything here except trousers for ferrets http://home.att.net...l/ferretclothes.htm
...so cute, I couldn't resist. [xandram, Sep 08 2006]

Michelin Man http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michelin
Bet he could fit a few ferrets in there. [imaginality, Sep 11 2006]

[link]






       white!   

       bah, it'll be budgy pockets next.
po, Sep 08 2006
  

       Is that a ferret in your trousers,...   

       (Sorry, probably an oldie in your parts)
Shz, Sep 08 2006
  

       thanks [po]. I was pretty sure I'd offend someone with that ;)
moomintroll, Sep 08 2006
  

       The ferret with the rabbit ears in [xandram]'s link scares the hell outta me.
NotTheSharpestSpoon, Sep 08 2006
  

       I like this idea... and it would work well with rats and mice or even my favorite animal, the humble fly. The garments clearly need connecting tubes, so that whole families can share their ferrets of an evening, whilst discussing the troubles of't'mill. Make sure your pets get share of this croissant +
xenzag, Sep 08 2006
  

       Whenever I think my (adult) son is not listening to some droning bit of tripe that I am telling him, I will slip in the phrase "and then you put the weasels down your pants".
Galbinus_Caeli, Sep 09 2006
  

       I don't see how this is a good idea at all, but apparently those Yorkshiremen already do something like this. My friend's brother had a couple of ferrets once, and I could never get over how bad their room would smell.   

       Perhaps "ferret legging" will result in many ferret fanciers being removed from the gene pool (in a bloody, painful, yet non-lethal way), along with whatever genetic predisposition the residents of Yorkshire have for keeping ferrets.
discontinuuity, Sep 09 2006
  

       At the risk of sounding cruel to humans, I certainly hope that anyone who engages in ferret leggging has already been removed from the gene pool.   

       Sounds worse than the time I thought it would be cool to try playing T-ball with a tequilla bottle for a bat, and beer cans on a metal railing.
ye_river_xiv, Sep 09 2006
  

       The 'The King of the Ferret Leggers' article that the Wiki entry links to is something everyone should read; ghoulishly hilarious. I appreciate my ferret-free trousers so much more now...   

       As for the invention, you get my bun. You could model the full-body-suit rabbit version on the Michelin Man.
imaginality, Sep 11 2006
  

       Regional eccentricity bun [+] plus, this might be a great way to benefit from the warming properties of fur, without the all negative aspects of actually having anything clubbed to death - taking the idea a step further, I'm thinking Scott of the Antarctic could have done with a few pairs of these.
zen_tom, Sep 11 2006
  

       Nanny Og.
DesertFox, Sep 13 2006
  

       Just as long as I can't sit on them, or inadvertantly kick them.
RayfordSteele, Sep 13 2006
  
      
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