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Using toilet paper can be a dangerous experience if you aren't willing to splash the cash on multi-ply paper. One minute, your fingers are securely grasping the paper, the next minute, there's a finger up your anus and you don't know whether to pull out or not.
The issue is probably that you are buying
cheap, nasty toilet paper that's leaving your bottom raw and your fingers brown.
So, I introduce to you the idea of a toilet paper that is so thick, yet dissolves on contact with water. It is made from the finest silky substances from China and a fragrance that'll make your excrement smell simply divine. I'm thinking rose and jam together, ginger and lavender, lemon and ade.
(I hope this was a challenging and interesting read, I haven't attended Halfbakery for a long time so my ideas are rusty.)
||Welcome back. Not much has changed, although fish-puns
have come back into fashion, then out and back in. There's
also a "no rapier" policy in operation since [8th]'s accident.
Which reminds me, try to avoid using phrases like "on the
other hand" while he's around.
||As to the idea, how does this thick, lusciously silken toilet
paper compare, price-wise, to the "multi-ply paper" on which
you were reluctant to "splash the case"? And in any case,
would not a goose's neck suffice?
||Some people prefer to look upon flocks of white-necked geese when surveying their estates.
||How is this an improvement on using a sliced pan
loaf? (American Wonderbread comes to mind)