Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Recalculations place it at 0.4999.

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Hygienic Heinie Wipes

a three-finger shit mitt in pulp and plastic
(+6, -6)
  [vote for,

For sanitary hands and spotless buns, make the Boy Scout salute, slip those three fingers into the next trapezoidal Heinie Wipe hanging from the roll or sticking up from the Kleenex-style box and rip it off.

Encased in bioplastic film, your hand will stay dry as the mitt’s palm side covered in cotton-soft paper fluff, swabs and absorbs.

The cornstarch-based bioplastic will quickly break down into water and carbon dioxide. This could become a common toilet product in hospitals, restaurants and better homes.

FarmerJohn, Jan 30 2005

Heinie http://www.m-w.com/...ictionary&va=Heinie
Ben? [skinflaps, Jan 30 2005]

bioplastic ohne Scheiße http://wired.com/wi....07/start.html?pg=8
[FarmerJohn, Jan 31 2005]


       Could they be pre-moistened?
robinism, Jan 30 2005

       off topic - what's the origin of the word Heinie? the high knee ?
benfrost, Jan 30 2005

       My [+] is for the term "shit mitt" alone.
Mustardface, Jan 31 2005

       My [+] is despite the term "shit mitt."
robinism, Jan 31 2005

       "Shit Mitt mit scheissen"   

       I don't know what that means, but at least it's symmetrical. As is "A heinie ha."
robinism, Jan 31 2005

       "Shit Mitt With Shit?"
Detly, Jan 31 2005

       My [-] is for the aforementioned term. Otherwise, not a bad idea.
david_scothern, Jan 31 2005

       The alcohol (or whatever you plan to use) might irritate a bit.
phundug, Jan 31 2005

       I wasn’t planning on using anything other than a rip-away, three-finger mitten in plastic film with one side covered in soft pulp.
FarmerJohn, Jan 31 2005

       Why not just use toilet paper?
macncheesy, Feb 01 2005


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