Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Fruit Machine Payphone

Less dull
  [vote for,

Coin-operated payphones are increasingly rare, but do still exist. They have high maintenance costs, and low revenue returns.

Now, BorgCo have a solution to the public service dilemma faced by the telcos.

Since many payphones now have some form of digital display, we have designed a combined payphone and gaming machine. The user has the option to pay the standard fee when they make a call, or opt to pay a little more - or get less call time - and in return the phone, when the call ends, "spins the reels" - after which the caller may (though usually won't) receive a cash payout, exceeding the value of the toll previously paid.

For those who do not wish to gamble, there is of course a no-gamble option; this is the default, and the "try your luck" choice has to be explicitly made by the user before placing the call.

This will encourage payphone use and make the whole process more interesting.

8th of 7, Nov 05 2020

Touchscreen Cleaner Booth Touchscreen_20Cleaner_20Booth
Added value .. [8th of 7, Nov 05 2020]

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       ...or you could, as you suggest, shave the cost of a penny off the charge for a call, and then repurpose the old phrase "spend a penny" (which referred to the charge for accessing a public toilet), and allow the payer of this charge to urinate or defecate right there in the phone box - people will love this time-saving, efficient innovation! ... oh, wait a minute...
hippo, Nov 05 2020

       Do you think including a coin-operated toilet paper dispenser would add to the marketability, then ?   

       Hmmm ... it could also vend condoms ...
8th of 7, Nov 05 2020

       Why not add even more functions? - example - shoe shining this would be achieved via a small person kept in a box at the base of the booth, who will clean your shoes while you're on the phone if you insert enough coins.
xenzag, Nov 05 2020

       We have Prior Art in that general area of endeavour ...   

8th of 7, Nov 05 2020

       [xen] You might have to differentiate those phone boxes where someone crouches at your feet polishing your shoes and those which you're free to use as a public toilet. I'm not sure you could combine these two uses of a phone box.
hippo, Nov 05 2020

       The only way to determine that is to try it and find out. How are your crouching skills, [hip] ?   

       // free to use as a public toilet //   

       No, it's not "free", you still have to put coins in the slot ...
8th of 7, Nov 05 2020

       [hip] They could do both. One hand could clean the shoes while the other holds up a wide necked vessel to receive the urine stream. 8th has already demonstrated adeptness of this technique and often deploys it on a Saturday night out to raise the funds for the taxi fare back to his caravan.
xenzag, Nov 05 2020

       //caravan// - you mean 'bunker' (Did you not see my [8th of 7] clerihew?)
hippo, Nov 05 2020

       Well, as it's windowless and half sunk into a bog, I suppose it is a type of cave. He got it cheap once Jimmy Saville's estate towed it to the outskirts of town.
xenzag, Nov 05 2020

       Yes, but it was worth every used tram ticket we paid for it ... it came with the contents included (though the cops had taken the better stuff) and some of it's worth a mint of money to the right buyers (i.e. twisted, deviant perverts). In fact, we'll send you a catalog .. cash bids only, mind.
8th of 7, Nov 05 2020


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