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Hadrian's Wall Toasting Bread

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Hadrian's wall was built by the Romans across the width of Northern Britain to contain the troublesome Scots from spilling over into England and causing a mess. This makes the name appropriate for application to a new type of toasting bread.

Hadrian's Wall Toasting Bread looks like normal bread, except it has a crust running all the way around its entire circumference. Once the bread begins receiving heat, the crust swells up to form a slightly raised encompassing wall that is a few millimetres higher than the main bread. It can do this because within the crust there is an extra edible ingredient that expands on application of direct heat.

Once toasted, the bread now has a crust which acts in exactly the same way as that of its Hadrian's Wall namesake. No longer will jam, marmalade, or copious amounts of butter be able to run out at the edges of the bread and make a mess on the serving plate.

Cheese on toast can now be delivered with a lake of melted cheese securely continued within the retaining walls of swollen crust. Criss- cross-crusts also enable a type of mad Batten-burg toast to be created, with different coloured spreads being separated by the internal crusty walls.

xenzag, Aug 13 2015

Perfect Toaster could work Perfect_20Toaster
Just adjust the toaster to not toast edges [sophocles, Aug 17 2015]


       sortof a macro English muffin... so how is this to be accomplished; magic ?
FlyingToaster, Aug 13 2015

       //It can do this because within the crust there is an extra edible ingredient that expands on application of direct heat.// I leave the details of the actual ingredient to my more learned chemists and apothecaries.
xenzag, Aug 13 2015

       //English muffin//   

       There is no such thing as an "English muffin". There is a muffin, period; and there are perhaps American or Lebanese muffins.   

       It's basically like the Queen. There is The Queen, and then there are Queens of Spain, Mesopotamia etc.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 13 2015

       //it has a crust running all the way around its entire circumference//   

       ... so, in much the same way that Hadrian's wall runs all the way around the perimeter of Scotland, with a particularly fiddly part encompassing the Giant's Causeway, and a barbican at John o' Groats to frustrate those who've just walked there from Land's End?
pertinax, Aug 13 2015

       Part of Hadrian's Wall remains under the sea which surrounds Scotland. This worked very well because the Scots were always terrified of coming into contact with water of any kind. This is one of the reasons why they only drink whiskey, even though it was invented in N.Ireland at Bushmills. Prior to that they would suck the sweat off each other's backs to gain rehydration at the end of a day of kilt weaving, haggis stuffing and mars bar deep fat frying.
xenzag, Aug 13 2015

       // terrified ... of water //   

       ... and still are.   

       What a dismally bleak and stereotypical (if painfully accurate) view of the Caledonian race ...
8th of 7, Aug 13 2015

       I think we ought to be a little less harsh on Scotland, since the Scotch people voted to remain part of England.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 13 2015

       Maybe a wall within a wall, If smaller slices of cooked bread are layered in the 'Hadrian bread' dough. Once cooked the Hadrian would have to cut in a certain line with the other bread which can then be pulled out. This would give the spread imprisoning slices wanted.
wjt, Aug 14 2015

pocmloc, Aug 14 2015

       The word that is missing here is "intumescent".
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 14 2015

       //I leave the details of the actual ingredient to my more learned chemists and apothecaries.// If you write it, they will come!
xenzag, Aug 14 2015

       OK, here's how you can do it.   

       Your slice of bread (or waffle, or whatever) should have a perimeter wall of a marshmallow-like belting. (Unfortunately, the "intumescent" part doesn't seem to be a lasting effect in edibles - the Ivory soap thing would be really cool, but goes poorly with blueberry syrup).   

       (Note that this product will not endure toasting - so if you want it on toast, you'll have to buy marshmallow-wrapped toast [or take this as a DIY project]. I think you could lay ridges of marshmallow cream across a waffle.)   

       When you go to microwave it, the piece must be supported on a microwave safe scaffolding which supports ONLY the marshmallow portion. The support should be given a non-stick coating - PTFE, butter, spray, etc. As the marshmallow warms and expands, it is lifted; the remainder of the bread droops. At the point where a smidgen of carmelization is beginning to occur in the marshmallow, the microwave should be turned off - but the bread should stay in place on the holder until the marshmallow rims and ridges have solidified.   

       Then, pick it off and apply your liquids of lusciousness.   

       Of course, as soon as you cut into it with your fork, it's all futile.
lurch, Aug 15 2015

       (linked) Perfect Toaster: If you're already adjusting the toasting levels through sensors & zones of heating, just don't heat the crust/edges much.   

       The zones that get heated more naturally contract, as they lose moisture. So, the lesser-heated crust would stay high.   

       Heat it more on one side to get a concave/lens/bucket effect as you wish.
sophocles, Aug 17 2015


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