Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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High Efficiency Incandescent Meat Bulb

Maybe Edison Stopped Too Soon
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Those new fluorescent low wattage bulbs shine a creepy light. Any light bulb connoisseur would readily admit that incandescent light is much preferable to fluorescent.

Thomas Edison is variously credited with trying anywhere from 1,000 to 6,000 different materials before finally discovering his filament material and calling it a night.

I suggest that he stopped too soon. If he had kept trying, he might have discovered that meat, perhaps in the form of jerky, makes a much better filament material in the vacuum environment of a light bulb, has superior iridescent properties, is environmentally friendly, and much more efficient. Different cuts of meat may produce a wide variety of mood lighting for any occasion. This may also be just the thing to revive a flagging beef, pork, or chicken industry.

We should not be so quick to toss the incandescent light bulb over the side in our quest for new and more efficient lighting.

Grogster, Jun 24 2010

Colonel Kilgore http://www.imdb.com...88/quotes?qt0517192
An obvious candidate. [8th of 7, Jun 24 2010]

Prior art http://www.youtube....watch?v=bowA1xUZpmA
But I be done seen 'bout ev'rything, When I see a elephant fry [MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 24 2010]

Replace the glass bulb as well http://gallery.nen....uk/image91067-.html
[pocmloc, Jun 24 2010]

Thor's Hammer Thor_27s_20Hammer
More on making meat twitch [csea, Jun 24 2010]

Carry on Screaming! http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0060214/
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0060214/quotes?qt0306242 [8th of 7, Jun 24 2010]

Couldn't Hit an Elephant http://www.rateital...tsylvania-1864.aspx
The General's final words... [Grogster, Jun 24 2010]

Sushi Lightbulb Sushi_20Lightbulb
At least [21] is in touch with his inner meat. [Grogster, Jun 25 2010]


       The sun is on average less dense than this planet.   

       However, huh? Are you thinking that the muscle fibres will glow? Are you also thinking that we'd get through a lot of non-vegetarian light bulbs?
nineteenthly, Jun 24 2010

       odd. odd. oddity odd odd. And strange.
Voice, Jun 24 2010

       Many bets have been lost by preemptively dismissing something as impossible. I understand that it is (at its most hopeful) wildly improbable; I am simply saying that sad fact does not seal its fate as impossible. Perhaps curing that meat in a solution of Chinese mustard and chlorine bleach will yield a breakthrough...
Grogster, Jun 24 2010

       I'm not by any means saying it's impossible, just that it's, as [Voice] says, rather odd. Is this like some kind of random walk through possibly connected usefulnesses? Why not try burning a loofah?
nineteenthly, Jun 24 2010

       Perhaps we should try giant light bulbs with people as the filaments.
DrWorm, Jun 24 2010

       Ah, the "Kilgore" light.   

8th of 7, Jun 24 2010

       There is prior art, actually from Edison himself (serves him right). In a very public demonstration, he passed electricity through an elephant. Elephants are largely meat. There are no reports of the elephant lighting up. (Link)
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 24 2010

       Your planet needs more adventurous innovators like Mr. Edison; Jackass meets Mythbusters, with a side order of Monty Python.   

       It's not enough to sit in the pub and say, "Hey, guys, wonder what would happen if we get an elephant and plug it into the mains ?" - you have to follow through, or lose all your street cred.
8th of 7, Jun 24 2010

       [marked-for-tagline] //Hey, guys, wonder what would happen if we get an elephant and plug it into the mains?//
Voice, Jun 24 2010

       experiment with a daisy-chain of glow-worms.
po, Jun 24 2010

       ... plugged into the mains ...
8th of 7, Jun 24 2010

       Must be somebody failed at the grill.
RayfordSteele, Jun 24 2010

       {MaxB] Well, yes, apart from a prodigious quantity of smoke coming from said elephant, it didn't light up --- but do remember, the meat is on the INSIDE...
Grogster, Jun 24 2010

       Only until you throw the double pole knife switch*.   

       (*it is appparently traditional to declaim,"You fools ! I'll kill you all ! MUHWHAHAHAHA !" during the process of switch-closing).
8th of 7, Jun 24 2010

       See [link] for more about the use of electicity on meat.
csea, Jun 24 2010

       damn, I'm gonna have such dreams...
po, Jun 24 2010

       <Kenneth Williams>   

       "Frying tonight !"   

       </Kenneth Williams>   

8th of 7, Jun 24 2010

       But African Elephants are, of course, non migratory ..
8th of 7, Jun 24 2010

       //African Elephants are, of course, non migratory ..// Depends on the voltage.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 24 2010

       This may very well be the application for sushi that [Suki] has been searching for.
Grogster, Jun 24 2010

darkspeed, Jun 26 2010


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