Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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I Speak Your Wait

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I Speak Your Wait is a machine on which you stand, then drop a coin into a slot on its front. Nothing happens until you step off it, at which point it speaks in a commanding voice, telling you in minutes and seconds exactly how long you have been waiting.

A printed statement then emerges confirming the exact details of your wait.

xenzag, May 01 2014

http://www.bbc.co.u...ondon/plain/A306712 I speak your weight [xenzag, May 01 2014]


       One practical application for this tech would be a chair, which comments on how long you've been sitting at your computer. Perhaps it could update averages, and offer positive feedback if you got in breaks more often (+).
normzone, May 01 2014

       It would be more entertaining if this machine simply gave the number of seconds, without mentioning any units. People would then try to guess what it was measuring.
skoomphemph, May 01 2014

       This is excellent, though I would ask that the pun is not made explicit on the machine. The solution to the puzzle should not be given, it should be deduced.
calum, May 01 2014

       hmm... are you sure "I speak your weight" is the generic terms for such machines ? sorry, seems odd is all.
FlyingToaster, May 01 2014

       A variation: the ISYWait machine functions as a trad. ISYWeight machine might but for the output. This allows the part who installed it to see if there is any correlation between the weight of the subject and the length of time that subject is prepared to wait.
calum, May 01 2014

       Leave it here and ignore [bigsleep].
normzone, May 01 2014

       OK, who switched [bigs]'s meds?
MaxwellBuchanan, May 01 2014

       It's possible that [slab] has them.
normzone, May 01 2014

       ah it's a "Speak Your Weight" machine, ok, bone rescinded.
FlyingToaster, May 01 2014

       //OK, who switched [bigs]'s meds?   

       Craig Venter has cornered the dried-frog pills market again? Which would explain Rob Ford's situation.
not_morrison_rm, May 02 2014

       Any smartphone could do this with a simple app.   

       Every time the accelerometer detected no significant motion for >30 seconds, it'd start a "wait on" session. When you move, it'd end that session & play an audio clip to announce your wait time.
sophocles, May 02 2014

       Although I hadn't seen the so-called *criticism* I think it's the manner in which [bigsleep] delivers his insults, oh I mean criticism.
xandram, May 02 2014


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