Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Low self esteem settings

There's always someone worse off than you (when you press switch)
  [vote for,

When you're feeling a bit down in the dumps it can be hard to read about other people doing better. Let's say you're sent an old school magazine saying how well all your peers have done, on tv, writing books, inventing this and that, sleeping with famous people, its a horrible thing naturally. So you may well turn quickly to the obituary section hoping some ex-pupils have died young, achieving nothing. And you may be lucky. But chances are even the obituaries are full of glory, even though luckily all passed. But the point is, you only want Them to send you stuff about the real failures and life disasters i.e. your peers who became wastrels, very unhappy, got injured and died uselessly. The sAme goes for the internet in general. E.g. Facebook. So you at the flip of the low-self-esteem setting switch you only see people who are even bigger losers than you, in horrible houses with hideous children. And you feel ok again
DDRopDeadly, Apr 13 2017


       Although porn sites are excluded cos you still want nice porn, i.e. Above your standard. Not pics of nudes from camps or a burns unit
DDRopDeadly, Apr 13 2017

       Would this be a website or a cell phone app?
whatrock, Apr 13 2017

       Could be both.   

       It would be equally good to be informed about contemporaries who, despite the outward trappings of success, are living miserable, hollow, unfulfilled lives, spend time and money on therapists, and are lonely and depressed.   

       Actually, that would be better than reading about the drunks, nomarks, spendthrifts and failures - knowing that someone's worked really hard and achieved "success", yet is deeply unhappy, would be much more satisfying, particularly that oily creep Peter who always aced the maths tests, seemingly without effort.
8th of 7, Apr 13 2017

       I have checked with my ratings team, and we agree that this is an excellent idea. [+]
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 13 2017

       Does this have anything to do with the women and men who always come up with ideas that are either baked, impossible, too expensive to produce, almost there but completed by someone else, or just plain old bad ideas? Just wondering.
pashute, Apr 13 2017

       Is this the Schadenfreude switch most think off as a German invention, but is really French?   

       or last lines of the poem "I'm Fine Thank You"   

       I get up each day and dust off my wits, And pick up the paper and read the 'obits'. If my name is still missing, I know I'm not dead - So I have a good breakfast and go back to bed.
popbottle, Apr 13 2017

       I don't LIKE the idea, but I like the IDEA (+)
normzone, Apr 13 2017

       A [+] to promote much-needed self-esteem.
farble, Apr 14 2017

       Engendering a diminshment in the self-esteem of other is even better.
8th of 7, Apr 14 2017

       I'm not a big fan of self esteem. I normally get the housekeeper to do the ironing.
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 14 2017

       It begs the question, how do you measure a society, if parts of that society need to negate/put down other parts.   

       It's the easy positivity from a differential with negativity rather than putting in some energy to be more positive. Positive pictures of things that are in easy reach might stimulate better overall more lasting thought patterns.
wjt, Apr 14 2017

       //It's the easy positivity from a differential with negativity rather than putting in some energy to be more positive.// Yes but, [wjt], these days we're all supposed to be being more energy efficient.
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 14 2017

       Only when we are kicking our future selves.
wjt, Apr 15 2017

       Couldn't you just turn on the news, to achieve a similar effect?
pertinax, Apr 17 2017

       ...or shop at Wallmart.   

       But who needs to buy walls?
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 17 2017

       //Wallmart// It's pronouced 'WHALE-mart'.
Sgt Teacup, Apr 17 2017

       hmmm... wall-mart > vallmart > voldemort...
FlyingToaster, Apr 17 2017

       The Store That Shall Not Be Named.
Sgt Teacup, Apr 17 2017

       You could have your Facebook feed read by Marvin the paranoid android.
RayfordSteele, Apr 17 2017

       I think this might have been baked - by the North Koreans
DDRopDeadly, Apr 26 2017

       Hopefully the guys who get chosen to make you feel better about yourself aren't made aware of it. Could you imagine? Being down and out and on your Facebook page you see "23,560 people have picked you as their pathetic loser to make them feel better about themselves!"
doctorremulac3, Feb 16 2018

       Would having to consciously set your own esteem settings each morning make you a better person?
wjt, Feb 16 2018

       The switch should simply turn off the main power for a set time period.
RayfordSteele, Feb 17 2018

       Wow. For the first time in my life I understand reality TV
Voice, Feb 17 2018

       The Jerry Springer show was the ultimate lowlife circus.   

       Thing is, you'd watch a few of these losers and feel good about yourself by comparison, until you started feeling bad about yourself for watching a bunch of retarded morons for entertainment.   

       Plus the dopamine receptors probably get worn down so the viewers need grosser and grosser people to get the same rush of feeling superior.   

       Personally, I watched bits of a couple of episodes, noted that during the fist fights nobody ever punched each other in the face, (I've seen enough, and been in enough real fights to know this is always the primary target.) realized this stuff was all scripted and staged and lost what interest I might have had.   

       Plus, I'm already like, superior 'n stuff with the intellectual deal or whatever.
doctorremulac3, Feb 17 2018

       // this is always the primary target //   

       Only for amateurs. Don't punch for the head, punch for the throat, middle finger pushed forward - try and break the hyoid bone and collapse the trachea, or a chopping blow to the side of the neck, pinching the carotid or the jugular vein. Otherwise, directly over the heart, or the solar plexus, or even dive low and hit the side of the thigh. That puts them on the floor, then you can use a chokehold or punch the back of their neck.   

       Put them down, then take them out.
8th of 7, Feb 17 2018

       Well, there are good and bad outcomes to fist fights. I've become friends with a couple of guys I duked it out with in my youth. Probably wouldn't have happened if I had killed them.
doctorremulac3, Feb 17 2018

       // job hunting //   

       Great fun. If you're energetic, then a ghillie suit and a .375 H&H with a decent 'scope will give hours of fun, but the best way is a well-placed pit trap with metal spikes at the bottom. After all, "The young hunter chases; the old hunter waits ..."   

       // wouldn't have happened if I had killed them. //   

       On the plus side, they might have killed you.
8th of 7, Feb 17 2018

       Doubtful. I'm pretty good.
doctorremulac3, Feb 17 2018

       You were better than them, is all. Either they weren't very competent, or weren't trying hard enough; or possibly both.
8th of 7, Feb 17 2018

       I'm not going to get into numbers of fights won or women bedded, but I will tell this, my second favorite fight story. I've probably told it before but I'll tell it again for those who might not have heard it. It's how I stopped a rampaging gang of 15 to 20 thugs with one sweet martial arts move.   

       I was about 11 or 12 walking with a buddy through the drainage canal in the bad part of town when a bunch of people from another affiliation spotted us, pointed out that were members of the enemy group and said "Get 'em!"   

       They all started jumping over the fence to get us and presumably leave our beaten, possibly dead bodies in the drainage canal, a pretty popular place for that sort of thing.   

       We were doing a reasonable job of staying ahead of them when one guy caught up with me and did an admittedly pretty sweet sweep move with his foot that tripped me and took me down. Imagine sliding into home base, it was that kind of move. It's gutsy because you have one chance to make it work and you're hitting the ground pretty hard yourself so if you miss, you've just slammed yourself into the ground and slid several feet for nothing.   

       So I was down and alone, my buddy having been saved by the old addage: "I don't have to be faster than the rampaging gang of thugs, I just have to be faster than you."   

       I had only one option, fight them all as best I could and take whatever happened. Hopefully I could land a few blows before they took me out. What else was I gonna do?   

       I jumped up, turned around and faced the raging mob, and struck a fighting pose I had seen in a martial arts movie once. This is where the interesting part happens.   

       They all stopped dead in their tracks with shock in their eyes. I'd like to think it was fear, but I think it was mostly shock to see this skinny little white dude stand up to do battle when he was outnumbered 15 or 20 to 1. But the look on the face of the guy closest to me wasn't shock. It was fear. He knew the first battle of this war was going to be fought by me and him alone, and clearly he wasn't going to get out of this unscathed before the reinforcements arrived.   

       Then it slowly something dawned on him, not sure what, but I believe it was the idea in his mind that "This guy is bluffing." and his look changed from fear to that look a cartoon cat gets when it finally catches the mouse. That "Now you're gonna die." look. As the rest of the group stood there dumbfounded, he assumed the same pose as me and gave me the universal unspoken body language signal for "Your move".   

       Want to hear what happened next?
doctorremulac3, Feb 17 2018

       Oh well. Maybe some other time.
doctorremulac3, Feb 17 2018

       One of the other gang's mum came around the corner? or you spent 6 months in a coma making the brilliant person you are today.   

       It's not guns/fists that kill people, it's technical training, or random chance. Of course if you can't shoot more high speed chances helps.
wjt, Feb 17 2018

       //you spent 6 months in a coma making the brilliant person you are today.//   

       Oh, you've heard this one before?   

       I'll wrap it up.   

       I took the opportunity afforded me be the fact that they had all stopped.   

       I ran.   

       This time, I'm not sure why, they didn't chase me. Respect for my sweet martial arts moves? Fear struck by my intimidating fighting stance? I'd like to think that they all knew that there as a slight chance that any one of them might have been the recipient of one of those dying punches.   

       But they probably just lost interest.   

       //It's not guns/fists that kill people, it's technical training, or random chance.//   

       But mostly heart attacks.
doctorremulac3, Feb 17 2018

       // technical training, or random chance.//   

       95% training, 5% chance.   

       When you're alone and a group attacks, and you hit the first one to come close once - just once - and he goes down like a sack of potatoes, and stays down making horrible choking noises, and you take the opportunity to slowly admininster a few well-placed kicks so the noises stop and he goes completely inert, and then you just smile at the rest and make a small beckoning gesture, oddly they're the ones that run.   

       That gives you the chance to break a few of your would-be assailant's fingers and greatly reduce his chance of ever reproducing before slowly walking away, whistling.   

       Sadly, not all evenings are that much fun.
8th of 7, Feb 17 2018

       You may have had better training that I did. My method was:   

       1- Receive punch to the face. 2- Punch attacker in the face. 3- Receive another punch to the face. 4- Punch the attacker in the face again. 5- Dodge the attackers next punch if possible. 6- Punch the attacker in the face again. 7- Repeat steps 5 and 7 as necessary.   

       Here's what I remember about fights: If you loose, it really fucking hurts. However if you win, it still really fucking hurts. (Unless you get lucky early on, which doesn't happen too often.)   

       I've always been civilized about it, never STARTED a fight in my life and once my man was down the fight was over, but for some of the monsters I encountered growing up, once you're down, THAT'S when the beating really starts.   

       Well, hopefully these stories make people feel better about their own lives, at least their youth, in keeping with the idea of this post. If you were smart enough to avoid that kind of crap, that's definitely something to be proud of.
doctorremulac3, Feb 17 2018

       Wow, [8th] - I'm impressed. That must have been a hell of a movie you watched.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 17 2018

       It's brilliant. The scene where Carrie Fisher opens up on Jake and Elwood with an M-16 is priceless. Do you want to borrow the DVD ?   

       The remake's rubbish.
8th of 7, Feb 17 2018

       //This time, I'm not sure why, they didn't chase me. Respect for my sweet martial arts moves? Fear struck by my intimidating fighting stance? I'd like to think that they all knew that there as a slight chance that any one of them might have been the recipient of one of those dying punches.//   

       None of the above.   

       Biological organisms respond in preprogrammed ways to given stimuli.
When the stimuli from current circumstances change to something previously unthinkable there takes place a pronounced cognitive dissonance which can last several seconds depending on the inherent mind-set or training of a given individual.

       Then comes the respect given any critter able to trigger this new response whether it happens to be a garter snake, a cobra, or even if it's your own species.   

       The predator sees you were going to go out swinging.
Grit counts.


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