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Moderator Belt

Starts to tighten as you get drunker
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Fortunately I am not afflicted with a weak bladder and have the ability to drink 3 quarts (quart = 750ml) and only need to relieve myself once during this period.

Last night I drank 5 quarts, and was fairly drunk. I actually start getting drunk on my 2nd quart, so you can imagine I was a bit 'on', as we say in this part of the world.

Unfortunately when I get a bit on, I generally behave quite badly, not super unsocialable, but my social restraints fall away and say whatever the hell I like to whoever is around. My friends don't mind this too much, since they know me, and we all get drunk together normally. The problems happen when we have a new person in the crowd or someone who vaguely knows me as a sober person and I start demonstrating how crazy I actually am - some people take offence at this point and it is not a good thing (as much I am 'innocently' drunk, and do not go out of my way to annoy people, it just happens).

There is a solution, the Moderator Belt, for people with stronger bladders. Basically the more you drink the tighter the belt becomes, forcing the wearer to visit the toilet more often as they continue drinking.

Here is an estimate on what would happen:

1 quart = No effect

2 quarts = noticeably tighter

3 quarts = uncomfortable

4 quarts = very uncomfortable

5 quarts and above = extremely uncomfortable

Now then obviously taking off the belt would solve the situation of restricted bladder, so nearly pointless, however in the context of my watering hole this is completely not acceptable (we drink at work in the work bar). However in this do not remove your belt situation, the belt would serve as a reminder not to drink too much or too fast.

AngelEleven, Jan 14 2016

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