Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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No Socks, Socks

sock it to them all
  [vote for,

I love the idiocy of the fashion world. It generates so many opportunities for products that no one needs, but everyone simply has to have so that they are different to everyone else, whilst actually being exactly the same as everyone else.

The lastest of these fashion trends is the non-wearing of any socks with shoes. Naturally the trousers are a little bit short or worn with a turn up to reveal and confirm that you are 'on trend' - same as every one else. Of course this is bound to bring with it a degree of discomfort, with freezing ankles and chaffing shoes, but not to worry, my new range of No Socks, Socks solves both of these issues.

They are of course pairs of socks printed with ultra realism to resemble the average naked male ankle, of my locale. This means the colour is mostly a type of pastie bleached white, complete with spidery veins, and a sprinkling of hair, punctuated by the odd scab or pimple. Naturally a photograph of the respective ankles will ensure a perfect match for individually customised pairs of No Socks, Socks to be made and printed.

"No Socks, Socks - I can't believe they're not, not wearing socks!"

xenzag, Feb 04 2020

7 of 9 borg https://www.youtube...watch?v=JGd8oEzT5Lo
[Voice, Feb 05 2020]

7 of 9 racey https://farm4.stati...03_34b18f3667_z.jpg
[Voice, Feb 05 2020]

7 of 9 nude https://i.kym-cdn.c...y_SleepySnitter.jpg
[Voice, Feb 05 2020]

7 of 9 costume http://www.sevenofn...org/sevenofnine.jpg
[Voice, Feb 05 2020]

reminds me of these "no-tattoo tattoo" garments https://www.ravenfi...ng-sleeve-rashguard
[pertinax, Feb 08 2020]


       What's wrong with full-length skin-tight transparent PVC stockings, like the ones you wear ... ?
8th of 7, Feb 04 2020

       // they'll look back on with embarrassment. //   

       [xen]'s PVC is pretty embarrassing from the front, too. There's something wrong about a garment that you need a bottle of baby oil* or a jar of Rentisham's** to help you get in to...   

       * Appled externally.   

       ** Follow the instructions on the label. Do not exceed the stated dose. If symptoms persit, consult a doctor. If symptoms still persist, consult a mortician.
8th of 7, Feb 05 2020

       Never flent your leggings with anything else.
Voice, Feb 05 2020

       "punctuated by the odd scab or pimple." nice touch, I appreciate the attention to detail. However I am concerned my carbuncles may require design copyright. I wear socks to stop jealous looks and envious whispers. I don't want to get caught up in legal wrangles or be socked when I see a particularly distinctive puss-y [hyphen added to minimise childish remarks] nodule on another commuters lower extremity; that would make me feel cheap.
darque, Feb 05 2020

       //a photograph of the respective ankles will ensure a perfect match// Celebrity ankle socks!
pocmloc, Feb 05 2020

       Steady on [Chairborne]; IIRC, our own [xenzag] has stated in the past that he rocks precisely that look. Anyway, "for all time" is a large claim; will a traveler from an antique land, having found two vast and trunkless legs of stone, still dis the socks on them?
pertinax, Feb 05 2020

       Roman legionaries stationed on Hadrian's Wall wore socks with sandals (caligae).   

       Not sure how that moves the discussion on, but there you are.
8th of 7, Feb 05 2020

       Sandals, on the scotch border, in winter, means losing toes to frostbite. If anything screams "Fashion victim !". it's that ...
8th of 7, Feb 05 2020

       I always wear socks with sandals. I take a special pride in being completely 'unfashionable', but I can claim to having taught some very successful fashion students, one of whom is now a total mega success.
xenzag, Feb 05 2020

       // I always wear socks with sandals. //   

       There is nothing wrong with that per se, but the convention is (as we understand it) that both items should be worn - in matching pairs - on the feet; socks first, sandals on the outside.   

       The way you do it is more than a bit weird ...
8th of 7, Feb 05 2020

       Why do the socks have to match? I couldn't care less what matches or doesn't - one black and one white sock suits me fine.
xenzag, Feb 05 2020

       OK, non-matching if you must ... just wearing them on your feet would be a start.   

       It's one thing to flaunt social conventions regarding clothing, and quite another to trigger the sort of psychological shock and trauma that you cause...
8th of 7, Feb 05 2020

       The reverse of this should also be available - i.e. sock tattooing for your anklular regions to make it look like you're wearing socks when you're not.
hippo, Feb 07 2020

       You could even have some sort of slip-on removable fabric covering that makes your feet and ankles look like they've got socks tattooed on them.
8th of 7, Feb 07 2020

       Even cleverer would be some sort of slip-on removable fabric covering printed to look like a sock, to fool people into thinking you were wearing socks
hippo, Feb 07 2020

       That would be cool, you should post it ...
8th of 7, Feb 07 2020

       // to fool people into thinking you were wearing socks// Wearing socks is by far the best way into fooling people that you are wearing socks. Wearing socks that look like you're not wearing socks is the best way of fooling people into believing you're not wearing any socks, whilst wearing socks!
xenzag, Feb 07 2020

       OK, this is clever. [+]
doctorremulac3, Feb 08 2020

       I think what’s needed is something where you can go sockless, but which fools people into thinking that you’re actually wearing a form of slip-on removable fabric covering designed to make it look like you’re not wearing socks.
hippo, Feb 08 2020

       Tiny shoe-mounted laser projectors which project the subtle sheen of a thin woven no-sock disguise.
pocmloc, Feb 08 2020

       ^ <smiles> Are those socks printed with lead contrasts? </smiles>
wjt, Mar 01 2020

       This socks wouldn’t fool anyone into saying “I can’t believe they’re not, not any wearing socks” My “no socks socks” are individually made to order from leg scans.
xenzag, Mar 01 2020


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