Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Predented Car

order a new car with customised damage
  (+6, -1)
(+6, -1)
  [vote for,

All new cars will eventually receive a number of dents and other damage. Most are accidental, like a shopping trolley impact but some will be deliberate, like a key scraping.

Predented Car allows you to choose and specify the damage your car will eventually receive anyway. As these are custom workshop manufactured, it's like having the "UnDented Car But With Dents"

Customers can choose from a substantial catalogue of dents and damage, confident that the panels will not have their structural integrity compromised by the denting/damage process. Keyed paint won't rust, as that wavy bare metal line isn't actually bare metal, it's been expertly sealed, lacquered and guaranteed never to rust. Buckled doors still close perfectly as they've been precision engineered to fit exactly into their corresponding factory made buckled frames.

None of this is cheap, and a predented car can easily end up costing nearly double the price of the standard model driven by the average Joe, but who wants to be one of them, always worried about their shiny new car getting bashed around?

You can also be certain that no two Predented Cars are exactly alike, making your car a real collector's item, totally individual and unique to you.

xenzag, Apr 23 2021

violins https://www.thestra...-violin/181.article
[pocmloc, Apr 23 2021]

clothing https://sveltemag.c...d-jeans-difference/
[pocmloc, Apr 23 2021]

vehicles (not damage merely dirt) https://www.theguar.../2005/jun/14/uknews
[pocmloc, Apr 23 2021]

Peugeot 206 Advert "The Sculptor" https://www.youtube...watch?v=No26JKQKZNE
Reminds me of this [zen_tom, Apr 23 2021]

rust stickers http://www.dominicw...x.com/stickers.html
[pocmloc, Apr 23 2021]

already being done with stickers https://www.google....Aw&biw=1261&bih=840
[xandram, Apr 23 2021]

Rat-Rods https://www.google....QAw&biw=887&bih=430
[2 fries shy of a happy meal, Apr 27 2021]


       // You can also be certain that no two Predented Cars are exactly alike//   

       I think you're missing an opportunity : "celebrity dents" could be a thing.
FlyingToaster, Apr 23 2021

       Like distressed jeans except for cars
sninctown, Apr 23 2021

       Correct and a lot more costly and difficult to acheive.
xenzag, Apr 23 2021

       On some cars, you don't want dents - e.g. on the off-road 4WD vehicles which everyone around here uses to drive along smooth roads to the supermarket, you want scratches running down the sides to suggest you've been charging through brambles, a covering of trail dust, and a few paintwork chips from stones.
hippo, Apr 23 2021

       Looks like someone beat me to it, despite my search, though with little detail. [marked-for- deletion]
xenzag, Apr 23 2021

       Nice title, though.
Loris, Apr 23 2021

       MFD disputed. The important part of this idea is that the car is intended to work perfectly despite the aesthetics.
Voice, Apr 23 2021

       Golf ball aero dimples could be interesting.
RayfordSteele, Apr 24 2021

       This is a silly idea. It would be like trying to sell pre-ripped jeans or something. No one would ever buy something like that.
AusCan531, Apr 24 2021

       Can do it with stickers… See link
xandram, Apr 24 2021

       Nice crossover of manufacturing, dismantling lines.
wjt, Apr 25 2021

       There is a subculture out there who restore antique automobiles specifically to look like they are rusted out husks still with paint jobs alone.
(I always wanted to suggest to one of those guys to look up inverted image illusions so they could indent a wrinkled beer can or some such into the metal of the box of the truck so that the illusion would be an actual can or what have you as you walked by)

       I myself did exactly what you are proposing at auction [xen].   

       [side-story] Skip ahead if you don't want to read.   

       My son burnt my last truck to a flinder when his friggin vape pen got stuck between the passenger seat and the console. The safety switch failed and when I sent him out for a tool he opened the door and fwoosh!
I grabbed my paperwork clipboard while getting dripped on by the flaming ceiling and slammed the doors.

       Turns out if it had been a mechanical fire I wouldn't have gotten a dime. As it was, the odometer had melted but they put it out before my last oil change sticker had melted and had to go by that reading and paid me four grand more than I had paid for the thing on a lot four years earlier. (messed up right?... but I'm rolling with it)
So I take the cash to auction hoping for a Chev pick up, (just my opinion, easiest to wrench on, longest lasting, most torque, etc. Easy there now Ford guys...)

       There's only one for sale that day. It's four years old and it's beat to shit.
I don't know what kid was given this truck for his sixteenth birthday or whatever but it's absolutely and totally what I'm looking for and absolutely nobody chimes in on bidding until they are starting it up to drive it off the block and I go "Yep!"
They approach my wife and I later and say, "We've just got to contact the owner to make sure they will accept that price." and I said, "I'm pretty sure I just bought that truck and I'll be taking it home now. Where's your insurance counter?"

       Took it to a mechanic buddy of mine and he gave me an hour of his time for fifty bucks and a case of beer.
Two hours later he won't let me leave because he is completely bent by this time to find a single mechanical thing wrong with the truck.
It had just been driven by a total rookie.

       I have been backed into twice now in parking lots since I bought it and I love that I can be like, "It's okay! It's okay.... Do you have any damage? Alright then, no worries. I bought it like this on purpose, just... keep your eyes open. You have a good day now."   

       Good story, [2 fries]; I'm glad it turned out well.
pertinax, Apr 26 2021

: ]

       I try to take take negatives and I turn them into positives. As far as I can tell that's the game I was given to play and I play it for all I'm worth.   

       "On your left Elon! Me and my beat-to-snot pick up truck are playing through..."   

       You get a nose for which shit can turn into shinola after a while.   

       [+] Unique stuff, more interesting world.
wjt, Apr 27 2021

       I cannot for the life of me find it, but, at least 10 years ago Sniffpetrol.com did something like this idea. It was an article along the lines of "Volkswagen to sell Used Golfs. Everyone always recommends buying a used Golf, so we thought we'd get in on that market. If you want something standard, like a 3yo 50,000mile 3 door in silver, we can supply that straight away, something more specific, like a dented estate with one brown door might have some lead time."
bs0u0155, Apr 27 2021

       I remember now, they're called rat rods. [link]   


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