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Suicide by Lawyer

In a Columbia and Honduras, standing next to a lawyer could be fatal.
  [vote for,

Some South American countries are managing to murder a lawyer roughly every month. Columbia or Honduras for example. See links

So the movie would be styled like Woody Allen's Zelig, ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zelig )

except some guy or suicide pact group trying to commit suicide by being near a lawyer. Like annoying unpaid bodyguards that ignore or are attracted to the most horrible things.

But then they have to go get the kids from school or some other mundane normal task. Of course, they just miss the various murder attempts and have to find new lawyers as their old ones end up in the ground or in hospital.

Film only needs to end if they actually all commit suicide. Can you say Sequel.

Funding the film might be easy, if you approach the Bar Association or the Trial Lawyers Association. They will want to help their fellow lawyers and it might help their own public image problem.

Quick think of what lawyer looks like inside your head. See the image problem ?

popbottle, Nov 02 2014

Columbia murders lawyers http://www.lrwc.org...man-rights-lawyers/
28 since 2011 says article. [popbottle, Nov 02 2014]

Honduras too http://www.telesurt...-20140919-0026.html
81 [popbottle, Nov 03 2014]

Zelig http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zelig
Guy who turns into you. [popbottle, Nov 03 2014]


       // Some South American countries are managing murder a lawyer roughly every month //   

       You say that like it's a bad thing …
8th of 7, Nov 03 2014

       It is a bad thing, if you are "The Lawyers and Legal Workers Life Insurance Company - Hispanic chapter".
popbottle, Nov 03 2014

       bunning on the general principle
not_morrison_rm, Nov 03 2014

       //You say that like it's a bad thing //

It is.
DrBob, Nov 03 2014

       What [DrBob] said.
pertinax, Nov 03 2014

       There are a number of ways that this premise could be improved (or at least varied):
1. Make it a computer game, like a reverse Lemmings, where you have to guide your little avatar or avatars into the path of stray bullets (is there even a Presidential Close Protection video game? There should be) or machetes;
2. Make the movie be about a suicidal misfit who can't bring himself to carry out the act who befriends a do gooding human rights or consumer protection lawyer - or maybe an elected representative - who has been on the receiving end of death threats, solely for the reason of being accidentally killed. They become friends. Or the lawyer is killed, the suicidal companion is the only one present, and he takes on the life of the now dead lawyer, becoming by deception and death the success he could never be, with a post-credits scene showing the one-time suicide risk in the gutter, having been kicked out of the law society for professional incompetence;
3. The lawyer that the would-be suicide clings to is actually a horrible man, a mob lawyer who has been skimming cash on the side. The would-be suicide is a nice man who has for been driven to suicidal despair. The suicide knows of the lawyer's transgressions - perhaps they are brothers? - and vows to be collateral damage in the surrounding Corsican revenge tragedy. The comedy comes through the increasingly unlikely ways that the would be suicide thwarts the murderous intention of the hired goons, by his or her desperation to die. Ideally, the audience would find themselves rooting for the deaths of both main characters: lawyer because he is a horrible person; would-be suicide because why deny the hero his ultimate goal? Hollywood would botch the ending by having the lawyer redeemed and the would-be suicide realise the value of life.
calum, Nov 03 2014

       //The lawyer that the would-be suicide clings to is actually a horrible man,   

       Hey, c'mon, let's not succumb to base prejudice here, the lawyer might be a horrible woman.
not_morrison_rm, Nov 03 2014


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