h a l f b a k e r yProfessional croissant on closed course. Do not attempt.
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Points should be awarded for distance AND accuracy to better represent the sport's origins: killing things from far away.
Ah, here we go...
https://www.google....AQ&biw=1000&bih=583 [normzone, Aug 08 2012]
[link]
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I thought the sport's origins were in a desire to see muscular androgynous women with spears ... or maybe that's just me. |
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I've been considering posting an idea I'd call 'Olympic
Mammoth Hunting', which would essentially be a stone-age
biathalon combining hurdles and javelin, with the spear
carried during the hurdle sprint and thrown at a target at
the end. I haven't put it up because it's a combination of
pre-existing sports and thus not really a halfbaked idea,
but since we're thinking along the same lines I definitely
have to award this post. [+] |
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//I thought the sport's origins were in a desire to see muscular androgynous women with spears // |
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Nope. Killing things, from as far away as possible. |
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[+] to Mammoth Hunting... |
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// Killing things, from as far away as possible. // |
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Re: my proposal to re-introduce high-caliber riflery to the
Games. The best competitive shooters in the world can kill
sheets of paper at 600-700 meters.* |
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*yes, there are 1,000-yard competitions, but I don't think
.50 caliber rifles are a good fit for the Olympics. |
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Wait a minute - I missed the girls with spears photos... I don't have television here, can somebody help me decide how to vote? |
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Wait, do you mean a java line? I suppose with the right sort of code, it could kill my desktop remotely. |
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I thought a java line was what you see at the airport Starbucks. |
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No, a Java line is what you see in the airport in Jakarta. |
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"My wife's just gone to Indonesia"
"Jakarta?"
"No, she managed by herself." |
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Not fair, no one liked my Echidna joke, and now we've got the "my wife went to.." jokes... |
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You need a sandbox to do it in. |
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- "I just went to a really terrible concert in South-East Asia"
- "Singapore?"
- "Yes, and the rest of the band were rubbish too" |
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"I took my fiancé for a meal in Southwark this
weekend." |
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"You take her up the Oxo Tower?" |
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"The particulars of our carnal embrace are of no
concern to you, you salacious cad." |
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- "I've just come back from a singing tour of South-East Asia"
- "Seoul?"
- "No, R'n'B" |
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My wife was having trouble picking a vacation spot, so I figured phuket. |
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They should be wearing skis, too. |
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//They should be wearing skis, too.// |
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They should have to ski down to a jump, hurl a
javelin at an archery target mid-air, land on a
horse,
jump a hedge while landing a shot put on a metal
rabbit's head, pole vault off the horse, over a bar,
performing a perfect triple-sumersault into the
pool
below, where they have to resurface in a spinning
upside-down pirouette whilst firing underwater
arrows at mechanical piranhas. How's THAT for
representing the sports' origins? |
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You forgot jousting, but this can be sqeezed in between the shot put and the pole vault, then using the jousting lance as the pole vault pole. |
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