Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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The Hysterical Motion Of The Drunken Psycho Scissors

cut hair and make a total mess
 
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During the lock-down many people will cut and style their own hair. As cabin fever sets in, some of these self made haircuts will turn out to be a total disaster, but who cares? Now is the time to have some fun; turn your hair into a mad spectacle and share with everyone else who has done likewise. Those who have let their hair grow for several weeks with naturally have more to work with, so we may see some unsual combinations; dreadlocks combined with crew cuts or mohawks meet mullets. Names should also be attributed, like: "The Hysterical Motion Of The Drunken Psycho Scissors"

Extra features can be included in the hair, such as strands of spaghetti or knotted latex gloves.

Once complete, images of these new can be shared on coronacuts.com Who knows? - in time a new style may emerge, as happened with the Peaky Blinder's series.

xenzag, Apr 04 2020

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       // some of these self made haircuts will turn out to be a total disaster //   

       Hmmm. Does not one Mr. B. Johnson of London have considerable Prior Art in this area of human endeavour ?
8th of 7, Apr 04 2020
  

       Many do. For years I cut my own hair, and used to chew off any longer clumps that I could get into my mouth when it was long and unruly. I once cut it all off and fashioned it into a hair rat that I kept on a place in the icebox of the fridge when I lived in San Francisco.
xenzag, Apr 04 2020
  

       Once again, [xen], you fall victim to the compulsion to divulge "too much information" ...
8th of 7, Apr 04 2020
  

       You know... it's weird. I sequestered myself about two months before this virus thing happened and I've been cutting my own hair for a couple of decades now.   

       If it wasn't for all of the propaganda on the radio I might not even know anything had changed.   

       2 fries, I now wish I would have taken you up on that invite to come to live there.   

       xenzag, I think it's very sensual when someone you love washes, trims and brushes your hair. We. (my daughter and her friends, and I). would do fixing hair trains, whereas each of us would wash and style and brush the girl sitting on the floor in front of us. I think we had 7 at one time. It was awesome.   

       So I like your idea, but I prefer having someone whom I live with and share cooties with, to do my do.
blissmiss, Apr 04 2020
  

       //tending your juniper bush?//   

       If that's a euphemism for manscaping then the answer is best left to the imagination.   

       [bliss] When I whip the rest of this place into shape there is a four or five acre chunk which slopes down to a creek where I intend to build suspension bridges out to interconnected suspended cabins as somewhat of a wheelchair accessible Ewok village in the trees.
Your kitchenette will have a covered veranda, propane fire-pit, a Murphy bed for extra guests... ooh, and fake Tiki torches. The girls have made me see the error of my ways and have vetoed real fire pits and Tiki torches in the canopy.
<heavy sigh>
We'll just have to make do...
  

       Ah yes, the character you constantly refer to as your "Personal Style Guru" ...
8th of 7, Apr 04 2020
  

       With enough long strands braided together you could fashion the suspension bridge out of hair. Just think of it. You could have the biggest attraction since the world's largest ball of twine.   

       If you put bliss's vision together with 2 fries, eventually we'll be living in trees, grooming each other's hair... maybe watching videos of gorillas for trendy cultural ideas...
RayfordSteele, Apr 04 2020
  

       Three ? We thought it was five. Definitely heard someone mention "five questions".
8th of 7, Apr 04 2020
  

       Heheh, spent a couple of minutes on the phone with my barber this morning...no go, gov't shut her down. So...   

       Black Market Barber.
FlyingToaster, Apr 04 2020
  

       Speakeasy hair salons...?
RayfordSteele, Apr 05 2020
  

       Follicular man's laughter.   
      
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