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Gotye's twee ditty emanating annoyingly from an abandoned smartphone in your office for the umpteenth time? You need the Reel Cone of Silence!
It's similar to the head of a plunger, but is specifically designed to cover a phone lying on a desk in such a way that any ringtones are muffled. It's flatter,
and has a fabric skirt to handle uneven surfaces covered in office clutter. Simply attach it to your rod & line and cast away!
Earn eternal gratitude from your long-suffering co-workers! Impress your colleagues with blind catches on the far side of partitions! Gain a reputation for trick moves like nudging the phone into the wastepaper basket!
You didn't have to wander off
Make out like you're not annoying and we're hearing nothing
And I don't even like that song
Now you're just a nuisance that I love to cone
//specifically designed to cover a phone lying on a desk in such a way that any ringtones are muffled//
[pocmloc, Jul 05 2012]
Not quite the same
[hippo, Jul 05 2012]
||I'd quite like something which looks like a normal piece of desk clutter, such as a box file, or a large block of Post-It notes, but which is, in fact, a hollow box filled with sound-absorbing material. This anechoic fake desk ephemera would cleverly conceal and muffle irritating phone noises.
||All I can think of is some sort of sound seeking missile.
||No wait, how about something called an annihilophone, that looks like a xylophone, but instead of various chimes you place phones on the beams and smash them with a hammer.
||[rcarty] that is a genius idea. Because, whereas on a xylophone, the sound is created as a result of you hitting the bars with the mallet, on your annihilophone, the sound actually _causes_ the operator to strike the phones with the sledgehammer. I would pay to see a maestro performance on this instrument.
||With accurate enough target acquisition, perhaps
the Dial-a-Smite service could be of use?