Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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The procrustean shoehorn

 
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But in a tender hearted style, and packs the toe end of the shoe with newspaper for too big, and secretly dispatches drone to get the bigger size, for too small.

Found someone recycling my ideas..I shall refrain from naming names..

not_morrison_rm, Nov 22 2015

Shoehorn linguistic conventions in European procrustean beds https://books.googl...%20shoehorn&f=false
[pashute, Nov 23 2015]

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       It might work better than the pie-crustian shoehorn, but not as well as the crustacean shoehorn, which is surely a must-have for hermit crabs.
pertinax, Nov 22 2015
  
      
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