h a l f b a k e r y
Expensive, difficult, slightly dangerous, not particularly effective... I'm on a roll.
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As an initiative of the Federal Communication Program
which subsidizes all citizens of an income greater than
poverty level to purchase the newest generation of
Microsoft Kinect device, this government-created
application has been created to improve national
security. This app will be uploaded
to the device in 10
minutes. Do not attempt to unplug the device during
installation. For your protection and well-being, some
parts of the application have already been installed on
your system. Some features of your device, such as the
'OFF' switch, have been disabled.
Your participation is mandatory. Ratings on your
performance will be available for your review.
||Thanks. Having the thing watch me as I move around in the
living room was already creepy enough.
||Not that I hadn't already made the 1984-ish association
pretty much as soon as we took it out of the box.
||Well... at least if the government wants to do
something like this, they will be forced to improve
our telecommunication infrastructure.
||Faster internet for everyone aye?!
||Didn't you know? We've had terabit home internet
connections for years. But most of that bandwidth
is reserved for government use.