Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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carpe demi

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Virtual Car

less than a space-suit, more than a personal stereo
  (+4, -1)
(+4, -1)
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For one thing, the white of a traditional space-suit would pick up too much dirt from the train or the bus. For another thing, you can distinguish it from an actual space-suit by the words "I'm in my car." prominently displayed front and back.

In other respects, though, this Virtual Reality device does look a little like a space suit. We're talking quite lo-tech virtual reality. You have the big space-suit visor to remind you of tinted car windows. The temperature control works by controlling the actual temperature inside the suit, not by feeding pseudo-temperature feelings to your nerve-endings.

The breathing apparatus enables you to screen out the smell of your fellow-citizens, and that of last night's beer, as recycled through their bladders.

You become very deaf to requests for spare change.

The most obviously car-ish part comes when the motion-detectors in the suit detect that you've sped up, and pipe a satisfying engine-roar into your ears, or a screech when you corner sharply. When stuck in human traffic, you can lovingly polish the car-maker's logo, attached to the suit where the breast-pocket would be, if space-suits had breast-pockets.

Your road-rage becomes hilarious.

Your roller-skates gain a new lease of life.

TODO: not yet sure how you will drink your coffee, pick your nose, or have sex in the back seat.

pertinax, Apr 16 2007


       Changed category, so as not to annoy real car people so much.
pertinax, Apr 17 2007

       You mean I should have mentioned the exhaust pipe?
pertinax, Apr 18 2007


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