Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Fewer ducks than estimates indicate.

idea: add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random

meta: news, help, about, links, report a problem

account: browse anonymously, or get an account and write.



When Giants Stride The Earth

You know, for posterity
  (+7, -1)
(+7, -1)
  [vote for,

Massive sculptures of halfbakers past (and others such as gods of rock, famous statesmen and kings and queens, for a fee) made from environmentally responsible materials like worm castings.

The sculptures will be treated with impervious coatings so they last at least 10 generations, to be remembered by future citizens. I'm thinking something around 150ft tall, like the Statue of Liberty, without the pedestal.

To be placed in readily accessible locations around the world, for the enjoyment and quiet contemplation of their followers and groupies.

infidel, Apr 30 2011

2000 year old Sri Lankan toilets for [neelandan] http://www.scenicsr...y-of-sri-lanka.html
Nothing like modern western ones - just a slab of stone with raised foot rests and a waste channel. [spidermother, May 01 2011]

French toilet for [spidermother] http://2.bp.blogspo...a_french_toilet.jpg
Is France western? [bungston, May 02 2011]

Patalexically http://www.namedeve...maceutical/2008/04/
"In Zulu, the word PATA when repeated as PATA PATA is slang for sexual intercourse" [normzone, May 04 2011]


       I always thought Mt.Rushmore looked a bit bare...
FlyingToaster, May 01 2011

       I'm fairly sure that the most environmentally responsible materials with which to make something that lasts a long time are long-lasting materials, such as concrete, titanium, or bronze.   

       Using worm castings like this is totally missing the point of how worm castings can be environmentally responsible. (If you were being ironic, then my irony filters are not at the correct setting today.)
spidermother, May 01 2011

       I read somewhere (Make Magazine?) that the longest lasting artifacts were something commonplace, of common use, like a water vessel.   

       Made of a long-lasting material like granite.   

       I've decided to carve a few and leave around for posterity.
neelandan, May 01 2011

       I saw some ancient carved (granite?) toilets in Sri Lanka, at the museum - thousands of years old, apparently. They were left around for posteriority.
spidermother, May 01 2011

       Then toilets it shall be.
neelandan, May 01 2011

       "My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings … look on my turds, ye mighty, and despair …"
8th of 7, May 01 2011

       I figured that it's OK to leave your mark, so long as it can be removed through diligence and proper hygiene, later.   

       I also like the fact that bronze castings and worm castings ought to be similar, with one of them bound to leave a greener lawn than the other.
infidel, May 01 2011

       I was with you until you threw in those those gods of rock and kings and queens.
ldischler, May 01 2011

       One for Victor Frankenstein looking a bit kneek...seeing as he had been beaten by his creation at draughts (twice), chess (3 times), noughts and crosses (27 times) and finally hopscotch.   

       Kneek is that nagging feeling you get when having produced some artificially intelligent being, that whilst one of you is destined for the appearance on Oprah, lucrative books deals, a long career doing consultancy work for the Department of Defence and finally retiring to a villa overlooking the Mediterranean on generous benefits it's not going to be the one currently wearing a lab coat.
not_morrison_rm, May 01 2011

       <applause> But it's OK, 'cause the one wearing the lab coat is supposed to be a dispassionate seeker of truth who wishes for nothing more in life than that his students should surpass him.
mouseposture, May 01 2011

       Aach, whatever happened to "You fools ! I'll crush you all, do you hear me? CRUSH YOU ALL! MUHWHAHAHA! "   

       It's the fault of the Universities. They just aren't turning out the calibre of deranged geniuses that's needed in your planetary economy.
8th of 7, May 01 2011

       In what sense //turn out// ? In the sense of "expel" ? They "turned out" Dr. Chou-En Ginzberg, M.A. (failed).
mouseposture, May 01 2011

       Precisely. He wasn't notably successful in his chosen career of International Supervillain, was he?
8th of 7, May 02 2011

       //It's the fault of the Universities. They just aren't turning out the calibre of deranged geniuses...//   

       I blame it on the high fees, not enough left over for that sparky electrical machinery, Igor's wages, those brains in jars etc... and who get the paternity leave, when I do successfully create a new life form?
not_morrison_rm, May 02 2011

       //I’d safely suggest that it appeals to our halfbakery kind of mentality.//   

       Being unaware till now that such a thing existed, now I'm afraid of it.
blissmiss, May 02 2011

       That's right, [bliss]. Be afraid … be VERY afraid …
8th of 7, May 02 2011

       /totally missing the point of how worm castings can be environmentally responsible. /   

       Really the problem is the multiple epoxy coatings. These edifices should be made of unremediated castings, with a constant daily repair required. The problem with these other durable edifices is that they were too good, and people did not need to take care fo them, so the love went out of their hearts.
bungston, May 02 2011

       [+] This should be under "Business"
pashute, May 03 2011

       I'm sure that [Unabubba] wanted to be a garden gnome instead.
xandram, May 03 2011

       More like an antique privy- old, creaky, and full of shit.
8th of 7, May 03 2011

       [MFD] baked, WKTE - Easter island...That's what it was, wasn't it? 1/2 mod 60 bakers convincing newbs/noobs they knew everything? You know, for accuracy...
4whom, May 03 2011

       Am I not the only one here who wears a strange cylindrical hat whilst using this site???
pocmloc, May 03 2011

       //Am I not the only one here who wears a strange cylindrical hat whilst using this site???// Yes ??? (presuming, a huge premise, in this case, that you phrased that hat question correctly).
4whom, May 03 2011

       [infidel]. Are you joining the ranks of //Bro was right. You're mostly a pack of arseholes who hide behind screen names.//?... by contributing an idea. You must realise a certain irony in this...   

       Anyway, congrats on your first purile attempt at an idea. And congrats on the timing of this steaming pile of detritus. In light of recent events, no 'baker worth his/her salt would stand against this edification of our past, and present, greats. Fortunately, I am not the salt of the earth. More like a manganese nodule, or a clathrate, trapped deep in the Mariana trench.   

       I take exception to your publisised stance on the nature of the average 'baker.I have neither the patience, nor any proclivity, to wait for the next installment of your psuedo-gratifying "idea" of how to glorify a bunch of arseholes.   

       A mind that can time that kind of polished turd, can surely think of better things. It is time to shit or get off the pot.   

       And just in case you think I am hiding behind a moniker (screen name), fuck you, you (should) know who I am. And if you don't, do a little research on this site and it will lead you straight to me. Caveat emptor: I am (at least as per last poll) twice the arsehole that I have ever been on this site.   

       Take your manky philosophy, disguised by your innate sychophantism, and shove it up your arse. We will ressurect this idea in a more tasteful manner, and if we don't, so be it.   

       "ask not for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee"
4whom, May 03 2011

       psst, [4whom], some of your phrasing could be misinterpreted as a dislike for [infidel].
MaxwellBuchanan, May 03 2011

       No shit, Mycroft!
4whom, May 03 2011

       <Peers cautiously over sandbags>   

       <Elects not to move while debris are still falling>   

       <Rewinds gramophone, puts on 78 of "Lilli Marlene", opens tin of bully beef>
8th of 7, May 03 2011

       <wonders why he can hear a digging noise underneath him>
MaxwellBuchanan, May 03 2011

       <the ringing of the division bell has begun> ~ appologies to Pink Floyd.
4whom, May 03 2011

       Well, I had "High Hopes"...
4whom, May 03 2011

       Let him have it on the noes!
pocmloc, May 03 2011

       Now Googling puerile, manky, syncophantism...Oh my.   

       [Infidel]'s home page does create some doubts as to why he'd want to be here.
normzone, May 03 2011

       If we're a pack of arseholes, I presume [infidel] is just passing through.
spidermother, May 04 2011

       lol [marked-for-category-change] hb: arseholes
FlyingToaster, May 04 2011

       I thought purile meant it was very pure.
bungston, May 04 2011

       Did I miss something here?
not_morrison_rm, May 04 2011

       I think [4whom] took exception to [infidel]'s account page.
FlyingToaster, May 04 2011

       // Did I miss something here? //   

       Indeed you did; but since the primary strike and the response were ballistic, they went over everyone else's heads, both literally and metaphorically.   

       Just tread carefully for a bit, there may be some UXO lying around.
8th of 7, May 04 2011

       //[Infidel]'s home page does create some doubts as to why he'd want to be here.//   

       Has anyone considered that he might have been speaking patalexically?
MaxwellBuchanan, May 04 2011

       Only you- no-one else can be bothered to look up"patalexically" on Wikipedia.
8th of 7, May 04 2011

       Fiver on it?
MaxwellBuchanan, May 04 2011

       I've looked it up already but the trail was unclear (link). Give him the fiver.
normzone, May 04 2011

       I looked it up but Google told me “Your search - patalexically - did not match any documents”.
pocmloc, May 04 2011

       That's because I used "patalexically" metanomically.
MaxwellBuchanan, May 04 2011

       Doesn't count, [pom], we specifically mentioned Wikipedia.   

       Come on, [MB], pay up. You can afford it; it just means a couple of your serfs will have to go without gruel for a week or two. Besides, didn't your Grandpa teach you to be a good loser. ?
8th of 7, May 04 2011

       I am using the teapot defence on this one.
MaxwellBuchanan, May 04 2011

       //Has anyone considered that he might have been speaking patalexically?// My first thought, in fact. However, since he disappeared after posting it, I construed it ortholexically.
mouseposture, May 04 2011

       Suddenly realises what's behind the mystery of the Moai on Easter Island... Wonders if Stone'enge an the Pyramids were just primitive methods of bunning the idea. Atlantis must've posted something worthy of the significant boning it received...   

       {Nips off to start preparations of a burned offering}
Dub, May 05 2011

       [4whom], I think it somewhat cute that you imagine I could give a flying fuck who you really are. If, on the other hand, you were actually asking me to help you remember who you are, then you're shit outta luck, because I still couldn't give a fuck.
infidel, May 06 2011

       Gods of rock and kings and queens because the greater public haven't a clue who or what a halfbaker might be.
infidel, May 06 2011

       If memory serves, this is not infidel's "first attempt at an idea." I seem to recall several rather good ones. Maybe I'm wrong about that?
RayfordSteele, May 06 2011

       You are right. I posted approximately 20 ideas previously, [Rayford].
infidel, May 06 2011

       Their disappearance leaves a sorely-needed hole.
MaxwellBuchanan, May 06 2011

       //{Nips off to start preparations of a burned offering}// Mrs. MaxwellBuchanan can give you the recipe.
MaxwellBuchanan, May 06 2011

       at least I'm hiding behind a real screen name..erm, hang on..
not_morrison_rm, May 07 2011

       You'd be better hiding behind sandbags. Come, join us …don't be afraid …
8th of 7, May 07 2011

       I was convinced for about a year that we (a select few of us including your's half truly) were on the cusp of being realized for our genius and being given resultant loads of money by a government or philanthropist to change the world for the better. I lost my job a few weeks later. And had to cut back on the delusions of grandeur without professional help. +   

       Back in '05, for those keeping score. That's when I had bad ideas fueled by bouncy interactive commentary. Nowadays, I just hope a few of you are reading, cause it's better than telling the jaw gapped drunks around town. A tad maudlin I know. Insert a weathered extra bun. I'm not old, but today I feel a tad so. This place has some damned history!
daseva, May 07 2011

       Welcome back, [infidel], I wondered where you went.   

       Since I am an extraordinarily tall person, I should think my statue would be much taller than 150 feet. Architectural integrity for //at least 10 generations//, whilst simultaneously trying to maintain environmentally friendly materials and construction practices, would require the impervious coating to be very thick indeed... perhaps to the point of obfuscating the underlying worm poop sculpture itself. The entire effect would eventually resemble something akin to a gigantic stalagmite with an aircraft warning beacon perched on top like a cherry.   

       I am therefore thankful that this idea pertains to //halfbakers past//, and the only way I can assure my local community that such an eyesore will not rise up in my neighborhood is to steadfastly remain a "halfbaker present."   

       It has not escaped my attention that, after your sudden disappearance/reappearance into the HB, you actually qualify as both. So, I would imagine that, at a chicken farm somewhere in the world, *half* a worm poop statue will rise up out of the barnyard (I assume the top half of the statue) somewhat resembling the Statue of Liberty as portrayed at the end of the movie "Planet of the Apes."   

       Long story short: Bun [+], as long as I don't have to look at it.
Grogster, May 07 2011

       Nice blog entry [daseva].
blissmiss, May 07 2011

       [MaxwellBuchanan] //sorely-needed hole// That's how I'd expect you'd feel after the weekend, if [MrsMB] sees your comment!
Dub, May 07 2011

       //may I suggest 17:49//   

       That wasn't a good year for me <Comte de Aglie drinks some more sanatogen tonic wine>
not_morrison_rm, May 07 2011

       "Ou sont les absinthes d'antan? "
8th of 7, May 07 2011


back: main index

business  computer  culture  fashion  food  halfbakery  home  other  product  public  science  sport  vehicle