Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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ant shaver

a hair grazing experience (sorry)
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Micro-ants could be bred to feed on nothing but human hair. Would then be introduced to face and beard growth would then become a thing of the past.

Of course micro-walls/hedges would have to be also used to keep the ants confined to micro fields. Unless of course you like the skinhead look.

slancaster, May 04 2001

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       Brings a whole new slant to the phrase, "Ants in your pants."
st3f, May 04 2001
  

       You could have hit on a biggie here. There could be the potential for a whole range of ant hairdressing styles and just think about the related products formulated and controlled by Laboratoire Slancaster. Also, no more nasal hair removers or beard trimmers -Saves a fortune in batteries and recharging.
Ivy, May 04 2001
  

       Control would be your problem, all right. Hair spiders might keep them under check in the upward direction--specially bred spiders that only live in the shaggier, darker forests of the human pelt, I mean. Perhaps you'd rub a little ant-appetizer solution on the hairy areas you wished to denude?
Dog Ed, May 04 2001
  

       Great idea. Even better if you could train them to eat in formation and create interesting symmetrical bare patches (kind of like corn circles). Or something.
Scotty, May 04 2001
  

       How about genetically modified "crabs" for bikini lines?
Bedford Van, May 04 2001
  

       Oh - I thought this was going to be a shaver for ants. Becasuse in fact, they are a bit hairy up close. Same goes for wasps (and gorillas).
lubbit, May 04 2001
  

       Why ants? Are leeches too powerful for your delicate follicles?
Snippity, May 04 2001
  

       Naaah! Leeches suck! I'm already working on ideas for the advertising. Locusts - Because I'm worth it!
Ivy, May 04 2001
  

       ...and besides, Gilette would never let you get away with it.
mihali, May 04 2001
  

       Thank you, UnaBubba, for sparing us. I believe I was counted among the sick, after your last little speech about that whack-a-mole worm...
absterge, May 04 2001
  

       Ants huh? Now that's weird. Controlling them where to eat would be hard. And leeches?! Those are too big to eat hairs!   

       What ever happened to an acid that dizzolves your hairs, but not your skin? Now that's a revolution.
DraginMaster, Sep 03 2001
  

       draginmaster: called Nair, though i believe it's actually very basic (as in alkali).. etc, etc
Urania, Nov 28 2001
  
      
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