Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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dental ants

specially bred insects for oral hygiene
  (+2, -6)
(+2, -6)
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A small container shaped like a mouth guard is inserted into the mouth at bed time containing hundreds of ants. These special ants wander about the teeth and gums nibbling on plaque and tiny food items that breed bacteria. After they finish feeding a bell sounds and they return to their container to relax.
benfrost, Jun 29 2002

Preening Shrimp http://www.halfbake...a/Preening_20Shrimp
Ants, shrimp, whatever. [phoenix, Jun 30 2002]

thank gawd, according to this it is unlikely we swallow spiders at all http://www.straight...bag/mspidereat.html
[po, Jun 30 2002]

Pest Control Trivia http://www.haltpest...news/index0302.html
Scroll past the 146 Year-Old Poem [thumbwax, Jul 01 2002]

How about microscopic robots instead? http://www.halfbake...idea/perfect_20hair
[mrthingy, Jul 01 2002]

Earwig folklore http://thefolkloris...critters/earwig.htm
Mentions the 'Night Gallery' episode. Thankfully it's not true. [waugsqueke, Jul 02 2002]

Phase IV http://us.imdb.com/Title?0070531
makes me say "no" to this idea. [calum, Jul 02 2002]


       are you sure that they won't just gorge themselves silly and fall asleep on the job. what happens if an anteater or somesuch wanders along and tries to climb into your mouth? sounds risky to me ben.
po, Jun 29 2002

       This sounds extraordinarily unpleasant. But it's similar to the idea of putting maggots in wounds to eat all the dead tissue, and it's natural. How do you stop them from biting your tender gums, as they don't distinguish between live and dead tissue as do maggots?
polartomato, Jun 29 2002

       Can you train them to do tugs of war with dental floss?
FarmerJohn, Jun 29 2002

       It's estimated an average of 70 insects, 10 spiders are ingested by humans over their lifetimes while sleeping.
thumbwax, Jun 30 2002

       its gone up, it was 5 last time I was told that.
po, Jun 30 2002

       clearly somebody somewhere skewed the average.
sadie, Jul 01 2002

       I'm going to go sleep in a plastic bubble now...
RayfordSteele, Jul 01 2002

       night night, sleep tight. don't let the spiders bite.
po, Jul 01 2002

       In west africa, there is a species of cocroach that lays its eggs inside the human ear canal while the victim is sleeping. The larvae eat their way into the soft tissue, causing deafness and brain damage.... No insects near me, please .....
8th of 7, Jul 01 2002

       I am 85% deaf and hon't dave dain bramage
thumbwax, Jul 01 2002

       don't earwigs have a reputation for doing this as well? When I worked in ENT, a few centuries ago, we had a chap come in one night who had a moth fly in his ear while he was driving. we coaxed it out with an apple.
po, Jul 01 2002

       po, I'm a little confused. Whats a "moth fly" and how did you get the apple in his ear to get the fly out?
barnzenen, Jul 01 2002

       are you sitting comfortably? then I will begin. the moth flapped its wings and flew through the van window into the drivers ear. could not find its way out and flapped its wings angrily causing one hell of a racket in the poor man's head. it was the smell of the apple that lured it out. OK?   

       re: insects and smells. I saw a woman on TV yesterday that put one dab of beetle female pheromone on her shirt and sat in a field. within minutes she was covered foot to toe in interested little beetles.
po, Jul 01 2002

       So I guess that, for her, size doesn't matter?
mrthingy, Jul 01 2002

       science, mrthingy, science. you plonker!
po, Jul 01 2002

       8th, you saw that episode of "Night Gallery" too, hm?
waugsqueke, Jul 02 2002

       Waugsqueke: It wasn't called "Night Gallery". It was a programme about parasites and entomology on (I think) BBC2 a few yeas ago. They showed quite a few peculiarly unpleasant creatures from around the world. Enough to make you go and live in a penthouse in the Hilton hotel and wipe evrything with Kleenex before you touch it. It put me off tropical environments for life.
8th of 7, Jul 02 2002

       What if one was to accidentally swallow all the little guys during the night?
NickTheGreat, Jul 03 2002

       You would have a little extra nutrition in your diet, that's all. Beats vitamins, eh? Ants are an accepted food in some parts.
polartomato, Jul 04 2002


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